Vlad and Dorian encounter
by Raiden Amour
Summary: Vladimira and Dorian the first time they meet, they have a very long and bloody night- Dorian can't control his calling. written in Vlad's point of view, and for some reason Vladimir is now Vladimira
1. First Meet

**Vladimir in my version is not a boy, but a girl named Vladimira- not that it matters as you read, you can still think of him... her... as a guy.**

**This starts right after Vlad pushed into Otis's mind to shove Dorian away, book 4.**

**Judging by the feedback or stuff, is what decides if I write more. So please, comment. **

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><p>I took a step back, for no reason did I want to be any closer to Dorian then I just was, "Whoa man, what the hell was that!" I may have been shaking but my voice came out relatively smooth, but loud. The look of surprise remained on his face, I don't think he had registered what had just happened let alone my question. Otis spoke to him, but it was a blur to me that mixed in with the angry crowd around him, I watched as Dorian turned to the door, stopping as he pulled it open. He looked over his shoulder and spoke something to Otis, but my eyes remained locked on his… his iridescent blue eyes, until he shut the door behind him.<p>

I finally broke my stare and averted my gaze to Otis, he was speaking with Vikas and a great discomfort crossed his face, I was still frozen in my place. I was a little freaked out because not only had I almost been sucked dry but I also would have liked it, I leaned back against the wall trying to think of a reason and also trying not to collapse to the ground. Looking back up to Otis, and in a more shaky voice then before I spoke, "What was that?" Otis, Vikas, and the other vampires looked at me as if remembering that I could have almost died, Vikas put a hand on Otis's shoulder and looked at me, "Dorian… is to have both our respect and fear."

'Yeah, I kind of got that', I thought, 'I thinks he's got enough of my fear!' I sighed and stood back up, walking to a couch in the living room, the safest place for me to be is here and I still almost became a juice box. All I had wanted was to sleep, but with adrenaline coursing through my veins, I just remained sitting on the couch listening to the vampires once again becoming comfortable and joking and talking in Russian, French, Elysian, and at rare points English.

I pulled my knees up to my chest, sitting sideways in the couch now, resting my hands on my legs, looking at the onyx ring on my finger, not particularly thinking about anything. I watched as the vampires started to disperse and eventually the only ones left in the house were Vikas, Otis, and I. Otis spoke to me in a soft and tired voice, "Come… I'll walk you home now," he grabbed for his coat, "No…. I'll walk myself home in a bit." Anyone could tell that he was exhausted and I was in no hurry to leave their protection, and after a few moments standing by the door still holding on to his jacket he returned it to the rack, as if sensing what I was thinking, "You are welcome to sleep here, Vlad." He placed a hand on my shoulder and I smiled up at him, I would go home, just not yet. They slowly walked up to the rooms, watching their shadows disappear I stood up, listening to my knees crack after being bent for some many hours. Silence was all I could hear, as if the house was just as empty as the day after the fire, there wasn't even any noise of crickets or animals outside. I cleared my throat to break the silence, then slipped outside, leaning against the shut door, remembering my vision from when I was younger. Shutting the door when I ran outside to meet my mother, quickly I blink away the memory while taking a step forward.

I didn't get very far, reaching about the middle of the road- standing up on my toes I froze, Dorian was right across the street, smiling on the sidewalk, balancing myself I looked over my shoulder, wondering if I could run back to the door and shut it before he reached me, but he shook his head as if reading my mind. I forced a smirk, sliding my shaking hands into my hoodie pocket, "Hello Vladimira." he smiled as my name slipped off his tongue, then he took a deep breath, holding out his hands again while shrugging, "I believe our first encounter was a bit brief…" he watched me, waiting for me to respond but language had escaped me for a time being. He continued as if sensing this, "Wouldn't you agree?" before I had even processed what he was asking I found myself shaking my head in agreement. He smiled, a hint of a fang visible for a second, walking towards me his hands still out in front of him as if pleading, but my feet were frozen to the ground. I wasn't sure if it was his mind control or if I was just to frightened to move, he shook his head to the second one. Then I remembered that he could move past mind barriers, so my mind was as open to him as just speaking, my face flushed bright red as he shook his head, his charming smile still on his lips, and he was now inches from me, practically standing on top of me.

I wasn't short, and he was very tall, but the top of my head only reached about the middle of his face, I had to look up to keep eye contact with him now as he was literally only about an inch away from me in the closest spot between us. The tone he used was both caring and stern, "I must have your blood…. You understand?" the look in his eyes match his tone, and I couldn't help but stare, I couldn't think of anyway out, then the thought hit me to get Vikas or Otis again. But hurt and impatience replaced the look in Dorian's face, "If you shall choose to contact either of them… The only good it will do is allow them to be present… I shall not make the silly mistake of underestimating you again…" And like that I had no way out again. Forcing myself to break my gaze from his I looked straight ahead, at his mouth, and slowly slid my foot back, once I realized how easy it was I quickly backed up, turning my back to him to go back into the house, "Sorry Dorian…. But I'm beginning to think our last meeting was maybe a bit too long." I forced a smile and found the door knob.

My fingers glided over the doorknob, my hand was shaking so visibly that if Dorian couldn't feel I was scared, then he would be able to see it now. As my hand managed to tighten around it I felt something strange occur, a pulling sensation- pulling me back to Dorian. I knew I didn't want to go back towards him, so he wasn't controlling me, I didn't want it, but slowly my head turned around, looking over my shoulder, gritting my teeth I looked at him. He was standing in the middle of the road now, his head tipped forward and to the side a little, and an impatient frown on his face, his hands out at his sides still. A smirk grew on his face and I found myself slowly forcing my shaking legs to turn and walk up to him. Shaking legs that were either shaking because of my fear or shaking for the simple fact that I was trying to restrain myself, but the feeling of me collapsing to the ground was replaced with the need to move.

_What are you doing? _He definitely didn't have the same hold on me that he had before in the house, but my movements felt like they were his again. His words came out cold, but he sounded as though he was putting as much care into them as he could force, "I was going to be nice…. If you agreed, then I would… nudge… your mind into liking it, but…," he sighed, a smile still on his face as I inched closer and closer, "sense you refused my offer… I shall only move your body to help." his head tipped back now, watching… waiting for me to reach him again. The thought that I was so used to thinking but never having said only reminded me that he was not deaf or blind or respectful to my thoughts like other vampires, _That isn't fair!_ A look of understanding and sympathy crossed his face, "You already understand the depths of this… But… life isn't fair."

I would have to try to get Otis or Vikas to help me, as I began to call them- scream for them to come and save me, Dorian raised his hand. I couldn't think anymore, everything just froze in my head, he looked down, the look of sympathy still in his dark ember eyes, "We shall have none of that… Who would it help?" he paused, releasing my mind again, "As I said, all it will do is allow them to watch…" I was only about a foot in front of him, the distance within each step grew smaller and smaller. "This way… they will never know… and we both know how much you hate people seeing you hurt…" I felt something tick in my body, my eyes shot up his- all fear erased and replaced with something like betrayal, he had been doing more then just reading my mind- he was searching it. "Especially when all they will be able to do is sit idly by… you know it would kill them, and that's why it kills you…"

Again I repeated my phrase, and he just gave a small laugh, finally I was back to where I started, only about an inch a part from him, my head tipped back to look up at his face. Something twinkled in his eyes and he continued speaking, "Do not take this personal… although, perhaps you should…? You are ever so special…" The back of his hand brushed my cheek, all I wanted to do was hightail it out of there and yet I still couldn't move my body. I looked straight ahead, not looking at his evil yet still charming face, I wasn't going to offer my blood to him unless he forced my arms to move, of which I already knew he could. I brought Nelly into mind, and Otis, I tried not to but the thoughts were to strong, what would they do if I died? They would have each other, so I suppose they would survive unharmed, Henry could have a normal vampire free life- except for when Joss came around.

Dorian flinched… more like jumped. As if just noticing that he could actually kill me, his head was tipped forward still looking down at me, he brought his hand up, softy pinching my chin between his thumb and pointer finger. Tipping my head back so he could gaze into my eyes, "I will not kill you…" the sound his voice made was more like he was trying to convince himself rather then me, I stared into his eyes, wondering why he said the opposite of that earlier. Concern crossed his face, "I was out from under my own control… but I shall be in complete control this time." He was still staring into my eyes, I asked him in my mind, _"I thought you couldn't control your callings?" _I was almost mocking but I wasn't trying to be, only trying to give myself more time. His face didn't change, although I wished it would, his voice came out even more caring then before, "I can't…I can only barely manage it." That didn't make me feel very safe, I tried to force my arms up, but they wouldn't move, I felt my arms shake instead. He used his own hand to turn my head, tipping his head down further, breathing warmly on my neck, his own face brushing against mine, he paused for a brief second, "I am sorry for this…" he whispered close to my ear and I felt his teeth slide into my neck, his hand still gently holding my chin, all I could manage to do was try to move my arms.

He was getting distracted, I was able to force my hands up, but to slowly to push him back, barely even fast enough to be considered moving. As soon as I felt his shirt, I slid my hands up his stomach, towards his chest, trying to push him off, gritting my teeth and squinting my eyes because of how hard I was trying but it appeared that this was as hard as I could push. Pain sprawled in my body and his other hand moved under my own, wrapping around my rib to place his hand in the center of my shoulder blades, his hand moved from my chin to the side of my neck and face opposite of where he was biting, pushing me against his face. All the while bending me backwards, leaning over me. My throat was growing tight, where he was biting felt nothing more then just getting poked with needles, but my vision was beginning to blur, the colors fading, and I began to feel hollow. He was loosing his control over me, but sadly so was I.

Blood began to drip down onto my shoulder and chest, his face still burrowed in my neck, I was leaning back on his hand, my knees where only strong because he still had them under his control and I was still trying to push him off. Pressure was growing in my neck, for not only was he sucking the blood out of me, he was also sucking my skin, I clenched my hands onto his shirt, pulling on him, but only to stand myself. _"Stop!" _I finally managed, I couldn't speak out loud but I remembered that I didn't need to, he replied in my mind, _"Not yet!" _he let go of my neck and wrapped it around my back and now had both his hands in the center of my shoulders, my hands still clinging to his shirt, he let go of his mind control. I would have dropped if he hadn't been holding me up, my arms quickly fell back, now dangling, my knees bent, and gravity worked against me, tipping my head back more. I was losing more and more of my vision, my breathing rate increased and I felt not only my heart, but also Dorian's beat faster. Dorian was drinking too much of my blood, I tried to speak aloud, finally able to move my mouth, but all that came out was a hushed voiced that never made it out of my throat, but it didn't need to. "Dorian… you… have to… stop." I could feel that there was no longer color in my lips, or anywhere else in my body. I was going to die.

Dorian slowly pulled away, taking only his fangs out, his mouth still open and barely touching my skin, he was breathing heavily, as if he forgot to breath while drinking, and the breaths where warm against my cold neck, he placed his lips back on my neck. I braced myself, thinking he was going to start drinking again, but his mouth stayed closed. Kissing my skin he breathed me in for a few seconds, I was still on the verge of passing out, if he wasn't holding me the next place I would be was the ground. I was watching the stars, but they began to fade into the dark abyss around them, I looked down and saw the street light and Dorian's hair at the very bottom of my eyes, having no idea what he was doing. He raised his head slowly, his hands still holding and pushing me against him, my head still fallen back, he stood up straight, standing me as straight up as he could manage without dropping me. Breathing hard, trying not to close my eyes, Dorian looked down at me, caring and love reflected in his eyes, my mouth was open slightly still from when I was trying to talk- not enough energy to close it, he bent his neck as to tip his head forward, pressing his lips against my cheek, his eyes now shut. Picking his head up slightly he looked back into my eyes. He features were blending and the colors fading, I had to blink to keep them there, but to even blink I to reserve energy.

I tried to stand on my knees, but the strength was not coming and I couldn't, even moving my toes seemed like too much effort, I tried to pull my arms up, tried to have control over my sore neck, but nothing. Dorian's eyes were still glowing blue, and still looking into mine with care and affection, I didn't know what he planned on doing next, whether kill me or quickly leave, I had to gain control of my body. Dorian was wondering around my mind again, "...I said I wasn't going to kill you... If I left you out here you would surely die." His voice was soft and smooth, or maybe that was just how it sounded in my ears, the rate that sound hit my ears and when he moved his mouth weren't matching up, my breathing was returning to normal and I could blink just barely a few times more, but he was still holding me up. He leaned his face over my own again, staring into my eyes.

The blood that had leaked from my wound had soaked my clothes and was now cold, colder then my almost bloodless body. Breathing on my lips, he stared into my eyes, I was wondering if maybe he thought I should be seeing something, to fast for him to know I was thinking it at all. His lips pressed into my own, moist, warm, and wet, the complete opposite of mine, the kiss didn't last long, and was completely one sided, but I didn't think that, his face had such a caring look to it. My vision wasn't getting better like it should have, black gaps began to come more often and last longer, I knew I wasn't dying, if anything I would pass out but I couldn't, I had to stay awake. During some point Dorian had moved his hands and now had one arm under my knees and the other under my shoulders, cradling me in his arms, which if I had the blood- I would normally flush red. My head was turned inward, to my left, toward Dorian, but I couldn't see anything, I had no idea where we were heading, I thought that maybe I should try to roll out of his hands, and some how get back inside.

Dorian kept his grip and spoke in my head, _"You wouldn't make it anywhere but to the ground... If you want to try, you are welcome to." _the voice sounded somewhat offended, I managed to look up at him, _"I don't want to have to try..." _My eyes were closing again, _"...Should I trust you?" _I tried to open them, but all color was gone, and before everything entirely went black I heard his caring voice, "No... you probably shouldn't." I couldn't reply but he read my thoughts to know what I was going to say,

_"Then I do."_

I woke up. Not only did I just awake, but I also jumped, sitting up. The laughter echoing in my ears, I was in the living room, laying on the couch, the vampires were still here, talking away with Otis and Vikas... "_Was that all a dream?" _I tried to act cool, one or two vampires noticed me jump but they kept going with their conversations, then I noticed someone sitting next to me, really close to me. Dorian. I flushed red, I had just had a dream of him drinking my blood... I was completely embarrassed. I looked at his face, he smiled back at me, _"Maybe the whole creepy, 'get past mind barriers' was all just a part of the dream."_ Dorian kept smiling at me, his voice was soft, not audible from across the room, "No... That wasn't," he laughed and I flushed beat red, sitting straight up, I looked out of the corner of my eye down at the space in-between us, my head had been resting on his lap.

"So..." I started, trying to tone down my red light bulb face, "Uh... did you see that?" I couldn't even look over in his direction, I was completely embarrassed. I was huddled up at the end of the couch, shifting my weight only a little bit to do so, my knee folded up to my chest and my arms hidden in the sleeves of my hoodie. He wasn't laughing anymore, "Yes..." I thought I must have made him mad, offended him, but he shook his head and I remembered the mind reading thing. I looked over at him, hiding mostly behind my hair, his arms and knees were folded now, and the dream began to slip from me. "I'm sorry..." I looked down at the couch between us, I felt bad now.

We sat in silence for a few minutes, then he finally spoke, "There is nothing to be sorry for." His words were simple, but it didn't make me feel any better. In my mind he continued speaking, _"I put those thoughts there... they are how you would've reacted, and how I would have reacted... a test." _He opened his eyes again, "Did I pass?" I asked half joking, I some how always managed to fail tests, "No..." That didn't make me feel too hot, even in the dream world I couldn't pass a test. "What did I do wrong?" I brought my other knee up, I upset him even if he wouldn't say it. "You trusted me." He stood up, walking silently out the door, I followed him slowly, hoping nobody would notice.

Again I saw him standing in the middle of the road, one small thing I remembered from my dream, I was on the edge of the porch, "Why a test?" I asked aloud, his movements stopped but he didn't turn around to look at me, "To see if I would kill you, or face any other problems," his voice was still quiet. Then he was gone, before I could ask another question aloud, but I asked it in my mind anyway, _"Did you pass?" _It was silent in my mind for quite some time, then I heard Dorian reply, _"No..." _Waiting for him to come back, I sat on the porch, but Otis came out after about 20 minutes, "Vladimira, what are you doing?" I turned back to look at my still smiling uncle, I forced a smile back, "Just needed some fresh air."

_"Dorian didn't kill me... So what did he do?" _

The party ended on a very happy note, I had never seen Otis or Vikas as happy since we were in Siberia. I was the last to leave, walking home to Nelly's, my timing was perfect. The phone rang just as I walked in, "Hello?" I was tired, but I tried to hide it from my voice, "Oh good you're home," it was Nelly, "I thought you would've been at Otis's but anyway I have to fill in for Debbie, so I wont be home till you get up for school tomorrow." She sounded like she just chugged coffee, "I'm sorry, I didn't plan on it." she added while I remained quiet. "It's okay, it's work, you have to. I'll probably sleep on the couch since I'll have the whole house to myself." I forced a laugh. I didn't like being home alone, especially at night, and Nelly knew that but I tried to hide it. "Well alright, remember to lock the door." she added before she spoke her good-byes and hung up the phone. I smiled to myself, trying to make myself feel better, but it didn't work long.

I stumbled upstairs, I always slept on the couch when no one was home, but I never left any blankets down there so I always had to march upstairs and get them. But when I reached my room I realized I wasn't the only one home. I couldn't tell at first, the light behind them blocked out most of their features, I saw a lean body, copper colored hair, and then I knew who it was. Dorian. I reached for my blankets, I didn't plan on deviating from my plan to sleep on the couch, he wasn't the first vampire to magically appear in my room at night. "Hey." I said simply, no surprise in my voice, and why should there be? After D'Ablo constantly sneaking in. He watched my movements, as if waiting for me to stop and pay attention to him, I had 3 blankets in my grip that I planned on just dragging off my bed and down the stairs, but instead I picked them up some and sat on them, still holding them. Looking up to him, sitting on the edge of my bed expecting it to be a brief conversation.

"So...?" I begun, he wasn't talking but he obviously had something that he wanted to say, he just didn't know how to start it seemed. He didn't do anything, didn't even shift his weight, I was about to stand again and just walk out when he finally spoke. "I'm sorry." I didn't' look up at him, I wasn't much in the mood for talking, "For what? The whole dream thing? That was fine, don't much care." And it was true, I didn't, I had mostly forgotten it, "Or the breaking into my room? 'Cuz I don't much mind that either." I added, not really knowing what he was talking about. I began to stand up again, but his words made me freeze. "No... For this."

Before I could process what he had spoken, he had me pinned to the wall, next to my open door, both his hands pinning my wrist. "What are you doing?" I looked up at him, he didn't plan to actually drink my blood now did he? Or was I asleep again? His voice was caring but impatient, "No, you're not... and I'm sorry." His head was resting against the wall just above my neck, he looked as if he was trying to restrain himself but losing. I quickly tried to stall him, "How did you fail? You didn't kill me." I was pushing myself against the wall as hard as I could. He wasn't going to answer my question... at least not right now, I struggled him with my arms, fighting as much as I could before he thought of controlling my mind.

My arms only managed to change position, now my elbows were bent, my hands to either side of my face, they felt cold, I don't think he realized how hard he was squeezing my wrists. Or he did and if he loosened his grip then I could wriggle free, but I didn't understand why he didn't just take over my mind again, I looked over at him while still struggling, he seemed distressed. Dorian's body was pressed against me, for the well being of him, if it weren't then I would have used the old cheap trick and took a very special kick. I felt his head touch my neck, and my hands stopped, my body was his again. My arms fell, his hands remained pressed against the wall to the sides of my head, I was looking up when his lips touched my neck. Gliding lightly over the skin, his mouth was barely open, as if not trying to but tasting me on his tongue.

Dorian kissed my throat, and then I felt his jaw open, he bit into my neck, with just normal teeth at first, and then I felt the fangs enlarge into my neck. It hurt worse then in the dream, cold and sharp, remembering vaguely what had happened he had promised me that he would not kill me... He didn't do that this time. I felt a lump grow in my chest, everything had already been solved and asked in the dream that all I could do was sit there and hope that he didn't kill me. I started to feel lightheaded, not even his control could keep me up, my arms slowly rose and I wrapped my arms loosely around his shoulders, my left hand on his back right shoulder and my right hand on his back left shoulder. Clenching his shirt in my hands, trying to hold myself up, his fingers were dug into the wall, squeezing the plaster, his body still pressed against my own, while I looked up at the ceiling.

I was starting to feel cold, my mouth was dry and my insides also felt empty, dry, and numb, it was becoming hard to think again. When I blinked my eyes stayed closed for longer and longer and it happened more and more. The sharp pain in my neck spread all across my throat and shoulder, I cringed my teeth trying to stay standing, for once I hit the ground I would be out. Slowly, I started to slide down the wall, the only thing keeping me up was Dorian's body pinning me against it, but that wasn't enough to keep me standing, The lump in my chest spread up to my throat, I tried to speak out again, tell him to stop, but my voice box felt like it had died, and again his mind control was loosening. His arms wrapped around my waist, his hands returned to the center of my back, he pulled me back from the wall, bending over me to continue drinking. _"Stop…"_ Even in my head my voice was becoming quiet and slow.

I forced my eyes open again, still looking at the ceiling, but my neck was no longer bent but now straight, I felt something behind me, though I didn't know what it was at first. Dorian was still sucking my body dry. I looked to my right, away from his head, to see a pillow, I was now laying on my bed. The thought was there for only a second, if I fell then I would be out, so he laid me down… that wasn't the point. The pressure at which Dorian was biting my neck changed every minute, from clamping down to where he was almost about to bite a chunk out of me to barely noticeable. It felt like he was trying to keep control but was loosing, my hands were now at my sides, gripping onto the blankets and squeezing as hard as I could manage, trying to pull myself up. He held his body like dead weight, I was losing the ability to breath from the pressure, I tried to bring my knee up, but all my leg did was slide a few inches. Feeling the wetness from his lips I also felt him smile, I had arched my back to try and push him off, but he didn't go anywhere.

Letting go of the blanket, trying to save myself while I was still conscious, I moved my hands up again, the texture of his shirt against the coldness of my hands sliding up it made my fingers tingle, my hands were now at his collar bones. Lifting up I tried to push him off, but he didn't even budge, I tried again arching my back with it to push him off , to no avail. I had managed to make my hands noticeable so he grabbed my wrists again and held my arms at the sides of my head, not for a second forgetting to drink. I turned my head, slowly, back and forth from my right to my left, trying to make it hard for him to drink, but all his teeth did was rip my skin and make me loose more blood. Color was already gone from my vision, only black and dark grays remained, my breathing rate was slowing, though my heart was racing, I had lost all feeling in my legs and my hands. I felt him sucking the blood but then he just stopped swallowing it, I wondered if maybe that meant he was done and that he was just savoring his last nibble, though by this time it didn't matter if he stopped for I was already far gone, my eyes closed.

Something wet and warm pressed against my lips, I couldn't tell at first, but I was drinking, and what I was drinking was blood, slowly I was able to breath again, my heart beating slowly. I forced my eyes open, and at first all I saw was black- blind for a moment. Then I saw an iridescent blue shine through, it outlined something of copper color and after a few seconds I connected it with Dorian, though my legs and hands were still cold, I was alive again. My eyes shut again, closing and opening on their own accord, but I saw enough to piece together what was happening. Dorian was kissing me, feeding me my own blood. He had sucked out the last of it but gave it to me instead, once all the blood was gone from his mouth his lips still continued to press against my own. He lifted away and I could breath fresh air again, I choked slightly, my eyes half open, my epiglottis hadn't fully been working and I felt blood in my trachea, my chest arched up while I weakly coughed, trying to get rid of the discomfort, Dorian was still sitting on me though. My head fell to my left to notice that his hands weren't holding me down, although my hands were still frozen as if he was, but I still couldn't move.

All pressure from him sitting on top of me had vanished, but I still felt like I was dying, I was hoping that he would return, if I was going to die, I didn't want to be alone. My watery eyes shut again, my own blood only revived me for a few long seconds, and just like that the pressure returned to my lower stomach and legs. Dorian was sitting on me again, as to what he was doing I couldn't tell, it was too difficult to even breath let alone try to open my eyes. His caring hand held my face, cradling my chin between his thumb and his pointer finger, all his fingers to the right on my face, he moved my head so I was laying straight again, barely any pressure to his hold. His weight shifted and I felt something press my lips again, but I kept my mouth closed, something wet and cold dripped down from the corner of my mouth, and then I felt a prick on my lip.

That forced my lips to separate, and blood slowly poured into my mouth, I couldn't swallow so it just slid down my tongue, at first I felt as though I was going to choke, my chest arched up trying to subside the coming cough. With his mouth still pressed against my own, it closed, locking off the blood so I could process the substance that I had already swallowed. My eyes slowly and halfway opened again, he sat up, I noticed a familiar thing in his hands, a blood bag, he drank from it again, taking a deep drag of it. Then leaned forward and pressed his lips against my mouth again, blood ran down the side of my face, I still had no energy to close my mouth or to open it wider, my eyes shut again and I fell into a blackness once more. He was feeding me blood to try and keep me alive, but my body was taking its time in returning itself. I woke up again, I had shut my mouth and he had bit the very edge of it again, pricking my lip as to get me to open it and for him to drain the blood into my mouth.

My breathing was still uneasy, uncontrolled, exhaling fast but inhaling slowly, my heart rate was slow, as if it had died and my legs and arms still felt ice cold. I wished I could move and cover up with the blankets, I didn't want any more blood, I wasn't hungry to begin with, all it did was make me feel sick. But I still couldn't even control my eyes let alone my whole body. My mouth closed again, all the blood was making me sick, but he gently pulled my mouth open again, I wasn't able to put up much of a struggle, I tried to close my mouth again while the blood flowed into my mouth, but he still had a all most unnoticeable hold on my chin, my fangs had never even enlarged for the amount of effort it took.

I arched my tongue near the back of my throat, I didn't want anymore blood, but the blood continued to fill my mouth, it started to spill out of the corners of my mouth again, he pulled my jaw open more. But my tongue stayed pressed against the roof of my mouth, I briefly opened my eyes, I felt so lightheaded again, colors where apparent but very dim, I felt something slid down into my throat, not liquid. His tongue pushed against my own, pushing it down as blood poured itself down my throat again, I felt like I was choking, my chest arched up again, my mind was slipping, I was trying to stay awake but I was using to much energy and everything in my body ached But my tongue stayed pressed against the roof of my mouth, I briefly opened my eyes, I felt so lightheaded again, colors where apparent but very dim. I squeezed my eyes shut, my head was spinning. I felt something slide past my lips, it wasn't liquid, he moved his tongue inside my mouth and pushed my own tongue down, I felt the blood seep towards the back of my throat. I tried to arch my back again, tried to push him away, at the moment I didn't much care that I would die without the blood, but that it was sickening and making me feel worse.

Still not having feeling in my hands or legs, I tried to move, roll off the bed or something, I felt awful all my organs ached once I could feel them again. Finally I managed to move my arm, slow just like any other time I tried around Dorian, I could only move one, and I still couldn't control my blinks, but I placed my still numb and cold hand on his chest. Trying to push him off, the blood was sickening and I just wanted it to stop, it wasn't the blood itself, it was the fact that the blood was reviving my body and it hurt.

I pushed and Dorian sat up, he didn't even notice my hand, my head was still spinning and I felt my body dying again, but it didn't hurt as bad as making it come alive. My legs continued to stay numb and the color began to blur again, I could see only grays and an outline of Dorian sitting up. He was sucking as much blood from the bag as he could, most of the blood had gone onto the bed and my face because I kept shutting my mouth. Dorian leaned forward again, opening my jaw to give me the blood, my hand was now returned to his chest and I tried to push him off and keep my mouth closed, but neither seemed to work.

Most of the blood fell onto the bed, I wiggled my head and tried to get away from his blood filled mouth. I couldn't move very much because he still had a hold on my chin, but I couldn't much fight anymore either, my energy was once again gone, along with the blood in his mouth. He sat up and sucked the very last out of the blood bag, his hand still holding my chin, he leaned forward and pressed his closed lips against my own. He finally felt my hand on his chest, I heard him drop the blood bag to the ground and wrap his hand around my wrist. Not squeezing or moving my hand like the times before, instead he held my wrist so my hand stayed pressed against his chest. He used his other hand to gently pull open my mouth, his own still closed, he slowly let the blood flow into my mouth.

Dorian pulled my chin a little more, so I pressed my tongue against the roof of my mouth, but he quickly pushed my tongue down with his own. The blood made my head pound violently and my eyes began to water more, feeling was returning to one of my hands, the one that he held pressed against his chest. His body felt on fire, though he clearly wasn't, I didn't want the blood any more then I did a few seconds before. My joints felt like there were screaming and my ears began to ring, I didn't like becoming undead, it hurt too much.

Continuing to feed the blood to me, my vision was almost back, I could almost control my breathing and blinking but I could still barely move. Every time I tried I just used up all the energy I had managed to save, so I stayed still, taking in the blood and not fighting back with him anymore, though I still wished that he would stop. His hand went from holding my wrist to pressing it against my own hand, sandwiching my hand between his hand and chest, spreading the warmth up my arm. The blood emptied from his mouth and I felt myself grow tired. I didn't feel like I was dying anymore but I still had almost no energy to fight back or even move, my hands and legs were still freezing but I could feel them, though I wish I couldn't.

Slowly, he picked his head up, no more blood in his mouth, I forced an eye to open, all I wanted to do was sleep now, his eyes were still glowing blue, the color was there but it faded in and out. He leaned back down, kissing my lips lightly, I felt the dry blood on my face, down my cheeks, my chin, falling down around the back of my head, in my hair and on the bed. The smell of blood only made me more sick and my fangs still didn't enlarge. His kiss was softer when he didn't have blood in it, but as long as I didn't have to drink anymore blood I didn't care, and he sat up slightly. Not sitting completely up, but also not leaned over me like before he watched me. I took energy to move my head, but I still tried, slowly, for some reason hoping that if I got momentum then my whole body would roll and I would be engulfed in warmth and blankets.

My head only moved a few times, very slowly, and he just watched, my hand still pressed against his chest, but his other hand dropped from my chin. His knees where bent and he was no longer sitting on me, but bent down over me, his free hand holding himself above me. I felt his breaths hit my right cheek, he was watching, my vision was still spinning and sounds were muffled. Dorian's body was giving off a warmth which was strange, for he was a vampire and vampires don't have very high body temperatures, but it was still warmer then mine. I raised my other hand, placing it on his rib, just looking for the warmth of him, he continued to watch me, he was watching and waiting.

Colors were fading, my breaths became slower, and I felt as though I was dying again, Dorian picked up his head and looked towards the door, moving his body just inches on his way to run back downstairs and get another blood bag. But no matter how healthy that might have been, to drink more blood, it was sickening to think about- I couldn't handle anymore blood. I kept my hand on his rib, I was sinking back into darkness, my arm about to fall back down to the bed but I squeezed onto his shirt. Allowing him not to leave to get blood, and to stay and keep me warm. He looked at me, breathing on my hair and ear, he didn't know what to do... He began to move, but I clutched onto his shirt. He let go of my hand, and I felt a coldness spread up my arm I had no idea where he had gone.

My eyes opened, he was standing next to the bed, looking down at me, I think it was new for him to not know what to do. I slid my hand up the bed, trying to turn to him knowing my body wouldn't let me, I inched my hand toward him, reaching toward him. Once my arm made it off the bed, I couldn't hold it up, so I just reached for him, grabbing onto his pant leg, feeling the warmth from his leg even though the pant leg wasn't touching him. My body was growing colder, I couldn't move to get under the covers, I couldn't stand this coldness, it was making all my organ and joints ache more. My eyes closed again, and I let go of his pant leg, I was slipping away, not dying but sleeping.

I woke up briefly, I felt so warm to my front, though my back was still cold. Managing to finally open my eyes, at first all I saw was darkness, my hands were holding something, so I gripped whatever it was tighter, and I felt a deep, low, and caring laugh. My eyes adjusted and I looked straight, I was laying on my left side with my arms folded up and wrapped around someone. Someone was laying on the bed next to me on their side, their arms wrapped around me, over my own arms, and holding me close to them with our legs tangled together.

I would have flushed if my face wasn't already feeling so red from how hot it was under the blankets, thought I was still freezing. Slowly, I managed to move my head back, there was a hand tenderly holding the back of my head that wrapped around from underneath me. My bones felt stiff and my muscles fought with me to move, taking all the energy I had to just see who the person was. I realized that my hands at been grabbing onto the back of their shirt, while my forehead leaned against their chest. I saw fair skin, then copper colored hair and instantly knew who it was.

Dorian was laying under the blankets with me, his other arm wrapped over and around my waist while his right arm was under me and cradled my head. His head was tipped down as to look at me, a bow smile on his lips, I gave a weak smile before I felt myself getting pulled back into wherever it was the I kept going, his eyes closed slightly and that caring look in his eyes looked genuine. He looked as if he had been staying awake, waiting for me to do something to say that I was fine, but my eyes started to close. I had no energy to move my head back down to its warm spot, so I passed out looking into his eyes.


	2. A long, long day

**I haven't really had a chance to review this, well that's a lie. I have at a chance to review it but I haven't, I'm too lazy, so feel free to tell me when you find a mistake because I know there is plenty- I've found a few but still haven't bothered to change them, but any who. It gets a little strange, and the characters are a bit different then they are in the actual book, but I kinda tried to keep Henry, Joss, and Otis the same.**

**Vladimira also has a different back history then the original Vladimir Tod, which I will explain in the future, I plan to, but I'm a lazy bum, kinda re-write the whole series with my character, I have enough time to do it I'm just not determined enough lol.**

**I'm sorry to bombard readers with this... should probably try breaking it down some more...? ... Well I have a whole 29,027 word document typed already on this story and this is what, 23 thousand? Hopefully I'll upload the rest soon.**

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><p>When I awoke again my eyes shot open, I didn't know what had happened, I looked to my left and saw a sleeping Dorian and then everything came rushing back, I remembered just about everything. I looked at the window and it was still dark out, looking over to my clock it read 5:12 AM. I went to sit up, but it wasn't as easy as I thought. Dorian's left arm was still reaching across me, holding on to my hip, while his right had slid under his own head. My legs where still in-between his although I had woke up from sleeping on my back. I looked back over at the clock, there was no use going back to bed, although I wanted to, I would have to get up for school in an hour anyway.<p>

I slid out from under Dorian's hand, rolling off the bed, using gravity to help stand me up, it almost worked against me. As my legs fell and touched the floor I tried to roll my upper body to stand up on them, but my muscles almost didn't react and I started to get a bit to close to the edge and fall off. I stood up, not very fast, but I still received a wave of lightheadedness, I heard Dorian let out a quiet laugh.

I started walking towards the bathroom, dragging my feet, I hated sleeping in skinny jeans because every time I woke up I find that the button had bitten my stomach. Sleeping in my hoodie also felt weird, when I woke up, the bottom scrunchy part that I normally folded under the hoodie became untucked and hung down loosely like a dress around the bottom of my thighs. The sleeves unrolled and slid over my hands, with the neck part of the hoodie pulled in one direction to reveal my shoulder, the hoodie had always been to big but I got it as a gift when I was younger. I yawned, pulling my arm up to my mouth, the sleeve falling down loosely till the middle of my forearm.

I reached the bathroom, I felt like a blob, and when I looked in the mirror I was shot awake. I had red stains all over my chin, neck and shoulder, a hand print on my neck from where Dorian held me to feed me that blood. My hoodie had blood all over the left shoulder, along with my shirt. I quickly threw off my hoodie and over shirts, wearing only my black tank top and bra on top, I ran back down to my room. Dorian was standing by the door of my room, about to walk out when I popped up, I didn't even look at him, I quickly went to my bed, there was blood all over it.

I let out a groan and sat at the foot of my bed, I didn't feel like even getting out of bed let alone having to clean. Dorian was still standing by the door, but watching me now, I looked over to him and let out another groan. He followed my gaze and looked at the wall next to the door, it had two holes in it and blood that slid down to almost the ground. Looking back at me, I had already moved. My back turned to him, I threw my shirts and hoodie into the blankets and bunched them all up, throwing them on the ground, looking at the sheet. My head dropped and I let out another groan, the sheet was covered in blood, and the pillows, and no doubt the mattress.

Dorian let out a soft chuckle, and I gave him an evil glare, but that didn't stop him. "You're messy!" I said, throwing a pillow around my arm at him, hitting him in the stomach. He let out another laugh and dropped the pillow on the pile of blankets, I pushed all the other pillows off too, not looking back at him, I pulled the sheet off and Yupp! There was blood all over the mattress. I let out another groan and he laughed again, "That wasn't me," He said simply, I could hear his smile in his voice, "You kept closing your mouth." He shrugged and I threw the sheet at him, it unraveled and covered his head and shoulders. "Well..." I started, I didn't really know what to do with the mattress, "Not my fault... I didn't want it." I went back to the bathroom and brought back a wet rag.

I sat butterfly style in the middle of the bed, attempting to scrub off the blood, but it only went away a little, it was stained. I let out another groan and dropped my head, "It's just a little blood." He was defending himself, so I threw the rag at him, he caught it again and dropped it on the pile, I stood up with my back to him, flipping the bed over, and it was still clean on the other side. "Yeah, it's just a little... only a pool of blood." My sarcasm made him laugh, but that didn't really help me any, I grabbed the rag from the pile and took it to the wall, scrubbing it while he stood there.

I was sitting on the floor now, scrubbing the wall, I brought my dry hand and rubbed the back of my neck, my fingers sliding over the deep scars that spread down to the middle of my back, I thought about them for a moment but quickly pushed them out of my head and stood up, the wall was clean but there was no way I could scrub out the holes. Dorian had been reading my mind, I already knew that, and I was hoping he would stay quiet about it. The scars where visible in a normal shirt so I always wore a thin Nikes turtle neck under my shirt and over my undershirt. With just an undershirt on you could see the scars on the back of my neck as they spread out across to the edges of my shoulders, down my back but you couldn't see that.

I figured that since he had already searched my mind there was nothing to hide, but that doesn't mean it was comfortable to have my back to him, I threw the rag on the pile and picked it up. Walking out the door as he moved aside, no longer about to leave, but instead watching me. I took them and shoved them into the washer, hoping that would get out the blood, if not spread the stain equally around so it looked normal. Only three people that I knew, knew about the scars, Otis, Vikas, and Dorian. They were a small reminder that I didn't move straight in with Nelly when they died, but went into foster care... they all were religious families and they all could tell I was a vampire and tried to get the demon out of me with brutal acts.

I walked back to the bathroom and looked in the mirror, it was too late to get in the shower but I still had blood stains all over my skin. Grabbing another rag I started to scrub my chin and neck, Dorian leaned on the doorjamb. We were both silent, I was busy scrubbing and he was busy staring, not very efficiently though. I didn't know what to say to him... If I should thank him for saving me or be mad at him that I needed to be saved in the first place, he shifted his weight, he was listening to my thoughts. I looked over to him, waiting to see his reaction, the rag still inches from my face, he didn't look at me though, he avoided my gaze.

"That wasn't very nice..." I finally said, speaking of several things at once, the stealing my blood and forcing me to drink blood myself and for getting it all over the place. He didn't acknowledge that I had said anything, probably trying to figure out for himself which part I was talking about. I decided to continue and chose one of the things to yell at him about since he was still here. "The whole... making me drink blood part." I could understand the need to drink blood, at least a little bit, so I pushed it off, as for the mess, I already called him messy. He had a questioning look in his eyes, I looked at him briefly then returned my gaze to the mirror and started scrubbing my neck, I had noticed that I had huge dark bruises on my neck and on my wrists, he probably broke the bone with how hard he was squeezing. "I had too." He didn't sound guilty, but he also didn't sound like that he fully believed it, "Yeah? Well... I didn't want it." I didn't look at him to see his reaction.

"You needed it..." his voice was quiet, and sounded very upset, I froze and looked over at him, most the blood was gone from my face, I already knew that, "I still didn't want it." Continuing to rub my neck and shoulder he turned, leaning against the wall, hiding from my vision. "I knew... I could hear your thoughts remember?" I washed out the rag, the sink filled with a rusty color, "How could I forget?" I walked out of the bathroom and to my room, taking a blanket and covering the bed, I didn't want Nelly to see an empty bed and think something happened, at least this way she would assume that there were still sheets under it.

I reached into my closet, pulling out two shirts, not bothering to change my clothes, Dorian followed me and was standing in the door. I followed his gaze to my wrists and neck, I looked around the room and found as many bracelets as I could, 3 bandana's and some sweatbands, throwing them on the bed so I could put them on. It would hurt, anything touching the bruised area hurt, let alone constricting it with a sweatband and bracelets, I folded the bandana's making wide cuffs out of them and put them on the thicker part of my wrist, using a teal checkered one to hide the bruise on my neck, it already was hurting. I licked my lips to realize that they were bruised to and felt like I had been biting them that work was all Dorian. I had all of the bruises completely covered and then reached in and pulled out a hoodie, all my hoodies were too big and my wrists always showed, other then the few bracelets I always kept on my wrist. I looked over and picked up the empty blood bag, with several small holes in it, "Why didn't you just try to put the bag in my mouth and see if maybe I would drink it?" I walked down to the kitchen to throw it away, Dorian followed, "I did..." He started, remaining on the stairs now, "You were dead... You wouldn't drink it after you were breathing either."

I went to the kitchen, normally I ate before going to school for the simple fact that I didn't want to be caught hungry in school, but looking at the blood bag it made me nausea. I looked up at him, "You want one?" I held it out, not looking at it, his head shook, course not you already got your fill I said in my head, throwing it back into the freezer and closing it. I walked pass him and back up to my room, he slowly followed.

I was laying face down on the bed, I had no desire to be up this early, I moved my head to the side, looking out the window at the now visible trees. I sighed and sat up again, Dorian still standing in the doorway, I sat butterfly style again in the center of the bed, one arm flopped down in front of me and the other up and rubbing my eyes. "Did your 'calling' care that it was a school night?" I asked letting out a yawn, "Especially the 'first day of school' school night?" He didn't answer, he could probably tell that I was only kidding but that I also was a bitch when I didn't get much sleep, I slid off the bed, away from him, my legs folded up against my chest and my arms laying against the ground palm up.

"I'm sorry." His silence made me feel bad, I stretched my left hand further left to grab my empty backpack, I didn't mean to sound like such a nagging bitch. I went to reach for my notebooks that were to my right, at the end of the bed, but I had to move to get them. I reached barely, my arm was a few inches to short so I dropped my arm to the floor and my head into my knees, closing my eyes again. Something touched my hand, I turned my head slightly to my right, peeking my eye open, Dorian nudged the books towards me, I let out a weak laugh.

I grabbed the notebooks and dragged them, shoving them into my backpack and zipping it shut on them, looking up to Dorian, he had a sad frown on his face. My own small smile slipped and I kept my eyes on his, "What's wrong?" He seemed like he was upset about something, but I couldn't tell what, was it what I had said? He wasn't looking at me although his head was tipped down, he was looking at the floor. I moved my head down and over, trying to make eye contact with him, and once I did it looked as if he jumped. "Hello?" I sat back up, holding his gaze, "What's wrong?" I repeated my question, it seemed as if something was eating away at him.

Standing up, I walked in front of him, looking into his eyes, but he wasn't looking into mine but staring at where my eyes were. I slowly waved my hand in front of his face, he didn't react, I placed my hand on his shoulder and he literally jumped and his eyes shot at me, I quickly pulled my hand away, at first he looked as though he was going to bite it off but when his eyes met mine they grew very sad and caring, I repeated my question again. He didn't answer, I continued to stare at him, concern was probably very noticeable on my face.

He gave a small laugh, "With me?" He finally answered, I looked around, "Well... Yeah...?" His smirk disappeared and was replaced with seriousness. "Vikas taught you how to control minds I trust?" I looked up at him, not knowing what he was talking about but getting some what tired of it, I sat down on the bed, still looking up at him. "Ummm... Yeah, he did... Why?" I didn't know where he was going with this, "Have you used it to get revenge yet?" I almost flinched, I didn't know where he was going still, but I knew that I would be nowhere good, "I have no reason to get revenge." I said simply, and I didn't, I wasn't a strong person on the concept of revenge, though I was while in the moment.

"You have every reason for revenge." He stepped closer, his eyes wide with eagerness, I still didn't know what he was talking about, "And who is this person that deserves to feel my vengeance hmmm?" I leaned forward on the bed, I couldn't bring anyone to mind, but I didn't have to. He brought them to my mind for me, drawing up 4 faces from my past that I had all but managed to forget. The hair on the back of my neck stood up, I acted as if I didn't see what he did, "So?" My voice was portraying me, shaking, "What do you think I should do, make 'em trip down a flight of stairs and get a few pumps and bruises? That's not going to do anything." I forced myself to look up at him again, my brow creased.

He stared at me like I was ignoring the main object, "You should kill them!" I jumped, breaking eye contact with him, "No!" I yelled back, my head tipped down, there was no way that I was going to kill someone, not again. I spoke again, in a softer voice, "They all lost their rights to have foster children... They can't do any of that anymore to anyone." My hair fell down in front of my eyes, I hated talking about them, the one time I had before- with both Otis and Vikas I literally got in a fight with Vikas and I couldn't stop shaking the entire time I talked.

Silence filled the room, he stepped closer again, "They deserve it!" I knew he was reading my mind and I didn't much care, in the full time I had known him, which was less then 24 hours, he sounded like an immature child for the first time. I sat there silently, Vikas thought the same thing though... Otis wanted to find and kill them himself although he wouldn't admit it. Everyone that had ever known about it, all they wanted was me to do something, but there was nothing that needed to be done. Dorian looked at me, he knew he was being immature, "Why you snooping around my mind Dorian?" I asked, trying to change the subject but he knew I was and just ignored my question.

"Someone should get revenge on them." I let out a deep sigh, "There is no need for revenge! Why is everyone so worried about revenge? Why can't it just be that I'm okay now and that's all that matters?" I looked up at him, my lip was trembling and water was building up in my eyes. When my parents died I was put in foster care right away, because of Nelly being a nurse they wanted to try and find a more home legal guardian.

I was whipped in my first home, branded, burned, and drowned in my second, burned again in my third and locked away in my fourth home, all of which I never wanted to return to. Nelly came and got me, when she asked I lied to her, saying it was cool, I lived with this astronomer guy and his wife who loved horses. She believed me and never asked anything after that, while in Siberia though I had had a dream about them and strangely enough I was some how putting all my emotions, fear, sadness, pain, guilt, on everyone in the cabin. Otis and Vikas ran into my room to find me asleep, Vikas tried to force me to tell them, that's how we got in the fight, they both promised to never say anything about it ever again, and that was the end of that.

I slid onto the floor, hiding my face behind my knees, Dorian looked at me and I replied with a simple semi-true statement, "I'm fine." He went to try and say something, but when I looked up at him he stopped, closing his mouth again. "Why don't you get revenge?" I asked him, trying to focus the conversation on him instead, he gave me a questioning glance, "It's obvious that something constantly bothers you..." I didn't want him to hurt someone, but at least he could talk about it. "That's different." He said simply, regaining his composer, "How so?" I looked back up at him. "It was my fate." He wasn't looking at me, but he wasn't avoiding me either.

Knocking from the door echoed upstairs, and then it opened, "Hey! You ready?" Henry's voice followed the echo, "Yeah, I'll be down in a second." I looked back up at Dorian then straight ahead, taking a deep breath to clear my mind. I went to stand up, but didn't get very far, my body was still refusing my movements, I tried again. A hand reached out in front of me, Dorian looked down at me, all angry and upset emotions seemed to be gone from him for now. I reached up, grabbing his hand, he gently pulled me up, but as I went to stand on my own I fell back down on my bed. I let out a groan again, laying on my bed, "I hate school..." I tried to sit back up but to no avail, I heard Henry downstairs, picking around in the fridge.

Before I knew what had happened Dorian had picked me up, and some how got me and my backpack downstairs using his vampiric speed. Placing me down in the kitchen, Henry looked at us with a not very surprised food filled face, he mumbled something but I didn't hear it. "What?" I asked, embarrassed that Dorian just did that, Henry forced the food down his throat, "I said, Who's your boyfriend." He was already getting more food, I smiled, sitting down in a chair, waiting for him do start eating the science project he was creating.

"The ghost boy in the corners friend, why you want one?" I laughed, leaning my head on my hand and may arm on the table watching him start to devour it. "Oh, I see... and no, thought the ghost boy couldn't have any more friends over after the last one killed pwinkel when she escaped from the crazy cat lady under the beds grasps?" He continued eyeing his food, "She has long since forgot that, she had a Imperial Zimbabwe heir over last week and since then has been arguing with the Chink in the chair because he keeps trying to eat the heirs Elephant." I loved talking to Henry, especially in this type of a normal way, I laughed to myself.

"Maybe the cat lady should have her cats attack?" He was zoned into his food that now looked like it was moving, "Sadly she tried, but the Cuban under the books got a bunch of lizards shipped in on Monday and since then his lizards have been killing her cats." Henry took a full bit of his creature, and I debated whether or not I should get something to eat myself. "Hmm... And the Arabian in the window? He'll do anything for something shiny." "Sadly the succubus Nigerian under the table got a leash around his neck and he's terrified to disobey her." I sat up some, this was an interesting conversation. "What about teal girl? she was zombfied last time I checked." He took another bite, "She has changed an awful lot. She got addicted to Meth and since then has been chatting away with hyena boy under the computer. But I believe Birdie will be back this afternoon and return to his collection in my closet, maybe he could set things right?" Henry nodded and in a few more gulps his creation had died. He set his unused plate and silverware in the sink and went to the freezer, reaching in and grabbing a blood bag.

"Don't much care if you're hungry or not, but it's the first day back and it'll be easier to last six and a half hours when you've already eaten." He waited for me to grab the blood bag, I let out a groan instead, feeling my stomach becoming uncomfortable with even looking at it. "Do you think its possible to become un-vampire?" I asked joking, not wanting to drink it. The recently silent Dorian appeared in conversation again, "You have to drink blood again sometime... And the sooner you do, the sooner the memories erase." and just like that, he placed his hand on my shoulder, kissed me on the cheek and left.

"Well? That wasn't what I expected, but sure, lets go with what he said, and add in the whole kiss thing too." Henry laughed as my face flushed, "how old is he exactly?" I thought for a second, "umm... in his twenties," It wasn't exactly a lie, "Even by those standers that makes him a cradle robber." Henry laughed again, sitting down, waiting for me to start drinking the blood bag again. "Well... bottoms up." I crinkled my nose and put the blood bag in my mouth. At first I felt as though I was going to vom, but after a few seconds it tasted like the blood I remembered and my body didn't feel weird this time.

_ "See."_ Came a voice in my head, Dorian was still dropping in on my head, I looked up at Henry and felt better that I had done it now rather then waited and got halfway through the day and decided to drink.

The day had gone by relatively smooth, I had almost no classes with Henry though, but the next class was with Otis and then only a short while longer till I could go home and sleep. As I walked into the new mythology room, the thought of Nelly's face if she goes to touch the laundry and it didn't wash out like it could have… I let out another groan. "Surely the day cannot be that bad?" Otis smiled walking in behind me, there were only a few other students already in the room. "I love you and all Otis, but I might fall asleep in your class today." I rested my head back, peering over my shoulder to look at Otis, a smile still on his face, he brought his hand up and placed it on my neck.

I jumped, the whole day I had my hood up and the bandana around my neck, but Otis pulled off my hood and I didn't know how much of the bruising he could see, I all but froze waiting for him to say something. My turtle neck shirt covered most of my neck, but not where the bruises where the darkest, they managed to slide up and show above the shirt. "Don't be shocked to find yourself in the office then," He smiled, I let out a quiet sigh,_ "Good, he didn't see it," _I thought walking slowly back to my seat in the back of the room.

_ "Vladimira, a word after school," _I let out another groan and let my head drop down onto the desk… This day was so staggeringly long and tiring and it seemed to only be getting worse, I don't care if he sent me to the office, I was tired and I was already going to hear it from him later. I fell asleep, my arms still under the desk, I didn't want him to pull them up and find the bruises on them too, something kept poking me in the back and it woke me from my deep sleep.

I had been sleeping for about 20 minutes, Otis was still talking about his rules in his class room and I wondered if I missed the 'Otis Otis' part. The poking continued, I slowly picked my head, turning around to find Joss there, stabbing me in the back with his pencil. I let out another groan… Joss was in my class, not someone that I really wanted to be around at the moment, I turned back around, setting my head back down on the desk till I felt another jab in my back. "Will you knock it off?" I whispered back at him, turning my whole body, he shrugged and sat back.

Again my head returned to the warm spot on the desk, but when I felt another jab it was deeper the rest and it actually hurt, piercing the pencil through my hoodie and shirts and skin, right on my spine. I turned around ripped the pencil from his hand and snapped it in half, setting it back down on his desk and going back to sleep. But again, I felt jabs, except this time I felt two, I sat still for a moment, hoping that he would just stop already but no, that's not Joss's style. He continued to poke me, probably wishing it was a stake and we weren't in 8th period, I turned around and stole the pencil pieces, putting them in my pocket.

Otis called on Joss, who probably rose his hand but my head had already returned to its warm spot before I saw him do so, "Yes Joss?" Otis sounded as if he knew what was happening and was already tired of it, "Vladimira stole my pencil." Joss's voice sounded like a small child's, complaining, but my voice didn't sound much better, "No I didn't, I'm sleeping." I added, Otis probably already realized that I did, and that I was also sleeping in his class but he wasn't as amused but was as annoyed as I was. I looked up, he pressed his fingers against his forehead as if he had a migraine. "Vladimira..." His tone was impatient but reasonable, :"You would do best not to sleep in my class, and return Joss's pencil." The rest of the class looked at me, so I turned back around and set the pencil pieces on his desk and leaned my head against my hand, trying to at least look like I was awake.

"She broke my pencil," Joss added, reaching into his backpack to pull out a pen, I didn't need to defend myself but I did anyway, "He wouldn't stop poking me with it." I gave out a yawn and Otis shook his head, not very happy, "If you two are going to behave this way for the rest of the year, I shall be writing a few too many office passes." He turned around and sat behind his desk, writing with his no doubt still atrocious hand writing, standing back up holding two slips of paper. Joss walked up first, not that I wasn't fond of the office, but the simple fact that it required me to move made me disapprove, slowly I left my seat and grabbed the note, my sleeve pulled up and a hint of a bruise was visible on my hand. Otis gave me another look but I didn't much care, _"After school!"_

I slid in the office chair, my bum barely even on the seat, waiting for the principal to call me in after Joss, but if he didn't hurry up I was going to fall asleep on him. You would think that a caring uncle would be worried with you if you came to school with bruises and a much paler complexion then usual but apparently not, that or maybe Otis didn't really care like he said. I squeezed my eyes shut, pushing away the thoughts, I didn't want to think that way, if his emotions were real or fake didn't much matter to me, as long as he didn't leave or tell me the truth. Finally I was called in and after about an hour I walked home, ignoring Otis's echoing in my head to see him after school, he was going to go to my house after anyway, why not save him some time.

I didn't even wait for Henry, which made me feel kinda bad but he planned on hanging out somewhere with October so I guess it wasn't that bad. Once I made it home I shut the front door, not listening to see if it closed or not and crashed on the couch, dropping on it without taking off my shoes or my backpack. My hand fell and laid on the ground as I stared for as long as I could stay awake, which wasn't very long, once I left school I had rolled up my sleeves and didn't bother putting my hood up for the simple fact that there was no one to look and see and it was too hot not to. I tried to listen to see if Nelly was home, hearing someone's feet on the floor behind the couch, figuring it was just her but not bothering to see, if it was her I didn't want her to no I was awake so she could nag at me, I was out.

I didn't bother to open my eyes, I was comfy and I wanted to stay that way for as long as possible, but the floor felt different. I fell on the couch on my stomach with my arm dangling off, the same way I was now but this wasn't the living room floor, I slowly opened my eyes, looking straight ahead to see two holes in the wall and with both another groan and a sigh of relief I sat up. My bag was over in the corner but my shoes were nowhere to be seen, looking over at my clock I let out another yawn. I was still tired, though I just had an extra deep sleep for two and a half hours, though with how far gone I was it should have counted for at least 4 hours.

Slowly I slid my feet on the floor, not bothering to lift them, I stood at the first step, hearing someone in the kitchen and hoping it wasn't Otis, but knowing it probably was. I stayed at the last step again, peering around the corner to see who it was, I saw a newspaper being held up, covering their body, but they stared to lower it and I saw blonde. Quickly standing straight up to hide behind the wall, it was Otis and he was waiting, hopefully for Nelly and not me, I turned around hoping that I could make it back upstairs and in my bed before he realized I was up, but his words didn't agree. "Too late," he took a sip of his blood, "I saw you."

Still dragging my feet I walked around the corner, his newspaper now laid on the table but he was still staring at it intently, I sat across from him, laying my covered arms on the table and my head on my upper arm, still on the verge of sleeping, but being careful not to put too much pressure on any of the bruises. We sat in silence for a few moments, I had no desire to be the one who started talking, not when I didn't know if he was mad, upset, or annoyed with me, one of his irritating yet valuable characteristics- not showing what he's thinking.

But the silence was also becoming irritating, "So..." I played with the smudge marks on the table, bored and not knowing what else to do, maybe he had forgot that he wanted to see me. "Where's Nelly?" I moved my eyes to look up at him, but quickly looked back down at the table, he seemed to be giving me the silent treatment, or reading a very interesting article- which was unlikely. He lifted his mug up to his mouth, speaking over the brim, "She left messages." He said simply, still looking at the newspaper and not me, clearly not wanting to talk to me, I stood up walking over to the phone, the operator number was flashing the number 4, I pressed the button. The first one was short, saying that she got called in and she was sorry she missed me this morning and that she wondered how the day went, the second wondering where I was and to call her when I got the message. The third one was from about an hour after, she was angry, she called saying that she called Otis and that I blew him off after school and that she didn't like hearing about me sleeping in class, and the fourth one saying that Otis was coming and that when she got home I would be in trouble, she must have been having a good day at work because she managed to joke that if I ran from her too that I would be grounded longer.

Letting out a yawn I walked back over to the table sitting down in my now cold seat, I would rather face them at the same time then at separate because they always contradicted each other so I always ended up in less trouble. I laid my head back down on my arm and laid my arms on the table continuing to play and make new smudge marks, waiting for Otis to say something. But again he didn't. After about 10 minutes I continued where I left off, "So...?" but he still didn't look up at me instead raising his mug to his mouth again. Although the blood tasted okay earlier, right now it just seemed nasty and I felt sick again, hiding it pretty well. "I don't appreciate students sleeping in my class." his voice was soft but stern, he had every right to be mad at me, I was completely rude to him in school and even after school.

Still not looking at me he took another drink and the smell reached me making me sick again, I didn't plan on opening my mouth while he was still drinking it, but he wouldn't agree with me, finally looking at me only to give me a glare. "I'm sorry." I didn't look up at him because I could still feel his eyes on me, I moved my head into my sleeve to let out another yawn, I needed more sleep. He was still silent, but his glare soften some, "I wasn't trying too." I added, hoping that he would look back at his newspaper now, but he didn't, just watched my finger as I slid it on the table silently. "Well..." He started, finally going to make this a conversation, "I know most students would try and take advantage of their family being a teacher." He didn't sound like he fully believed his own words but like he was trying to avoid something else, "Yeah," I laughed weakly, "So they can continue to deal with it when they leave school?" My eyes found a half smile on his lips, he wasn't really mad at me, just trying to sound it.

He looked back down at the newspaper but not reading it, instead folding it up and setting it aside neatly, which meant he wanted to talk about something more serious. I would take talking about sleeping in class right now if I could avoid the conversation I was hoping wasn't coming next, but Hope wasn't much on my side today it seemed. "Take off the bandanas." His voice was delicate though he was commanding me to do something, I let out a groan while letting my head sink to the table and my arms fold behind my neck to untie it, letting it drop to the table, but I still let my head rest. "All of them." He added and it made me let out another groan, without looking up I untied the bandanas on my wrists, letting them fall and unravel to the table, still not looking up.

Not really wanting to the look on his face I raised my head, setting my chin on the table and looking at him, my arms folded softly in front of my lower half of my face, he wasn't in a very good mood at all but he seemed like he was trying. I only had on about 5 candy bracelets left on each wrist, opaque with vibrant colors of the rainbow from clear to dark purple, he held out his hand, resting his elbow on the table, "Hand." Slowly I obliged and slowly reached my hand away from myself, not putting my hand in his own but letting him grab it, I didn't like people touching my hands, it always felt weird. Pulling off the remaining bracelets he stared at me while I looked down at the table, he held my fingers and thumb, looking at the giant some what square bruise on my wrist that was about 4 maybe 5 inches long, a light maroon and yellow color.

"What happened?" That's all he really wanted to know, his voice was caring and yet still stern, but he didn't seem mad like I thought he was in class, I didn't look up at him, "Nothing." My voice was quiet because I knew he wouldn't like that answer but that was the only one that he was going to get out of me, he held out his other hand, I let him grab my own hand. He let go of my other hand but he didn't want me to pull it back to me, he pulled off the bracelets and looked up at me, "Nothing?" He sounded annoyed but still caring, "Yupp." I replied as he grabbed both my hands, bending them at my elbows, not putting much pressure into his hold, but it still hurt, but he was making it so I would look at them, "This doesn't look like nothing." I didn't reply, letting go of my hands he sat back in his chair, clucking his tongue, "What about your neck?" he sounded really annoyed, "That nothing too?"

He was being serious, more serious then I could stand, so I answered with a smirk on my face, "Gee, how'd you know?" I wouldn't have been surprised if he stormed out of the house and didn't speak to me, I was always being so mean to him that I was surprised he ever talked to me again. "Let me see." His elbow was on the table and he sat up some, rubbing his forehead with impatience. "Why?" I pulled my arms back to me, folding them in front of my face again, "Vladimira." I didn't like that, only he and Nelly could do that to me, just say my name in an impatient voice and I would let out a groan or a sigh and do what they said. I sat up some, pulling the collar of my shirt down a bit so he could see some of the bruise, I wasn't going to take off my sweatshirt, but sadly I would have to, "The whole thing." He lowered his hand from his forehead and looked up at me; I let out a groan and pulled my sweatshirt over my head, followed by two shirts at the same time. Revealing a very pale child in a black wife beater, with a bruise that spread from a few inches below the jaw to the middle of the collar bone, dark blue and yellow with a dark maroon circle in the lower part of my neck, slowly starting to shrink.

It really wasn't all that big, I don't know what he was getting all mad over, he took a deep breath and let it out slowly, closing his eyes and then looking up at me, "Who is that from?" He was staring at it as if it was going to walk away on him, I moved my hair off my right shoulder so that as it lay behind me and it would cover some of my left shoulder and the bruise, though all I wanted to do was hide behind my hair, "Nobody." I said simply, I was hoping that he didn't think that I had this done intentionally, that's the last thing I would have wanted. I finally managed to look at his face, and he looked as if he was going to cry, so I quickly looked back down at the table, his voice made me feel even worse, "Vlad... How am I supposed to help you if you don't tell me anything?" Soft and hurt, a combination I didn't like hearing in people's voices- especially Otis's.

I tried to push off the question, but it showed through in my voice, shaking and quiet, "Who said I needed help?" Pushing him away, something that I didn't like doing but I also didn't like having someone think that they needed to protect me or help me, "Nobody, I guess." He leaned back in his seat again, I forced a smirk on my face, but it wavered and he saw through it, "Nobody's a pretty popular fellow." He let out a sigh, an irritated sigh, and put his arms back on the table, staring at me, but I couldn't return the awkward favor. "Why are you protecting them?" Concern slipped into his voice, again I thought why couldn't people just be happy that I was okay at the moment, I slipped my hoodie back on, too tired to pull the shirts on too. "I'm not," and I wasn't... Not really... Okay, so I might have been- not the main focus in my mind, but I don't know why he needed to know.

"If you're afraid that they could do it again, I'll take care of it before they can." I scoffed, force of habit, felling sorry after I did it, but he could already tell that. I didn't need someone else to fix my problems; I could handle them myself- even if I don't know how yet, but there was more behind it then just my self pride. People said that all the time when I was younger and yet it never mattered, I would go and say something since they would constantly pressure me but they wouldn't do anything. Or when they tried the person had already found out and was mad at me, just making things worse. Otis looked as though he was going to begin crying, he understood why I scoffed and he excused it but I still felt bad, "I'm sorry." I was always pushing him away and I didn't want to but that's just what I always managed to do, especially when I gave him attitude like I just had done. "Listen, Vladimira..." He started slowly and I could already tell that I didn't like where this was going or where it would end. "I wasn't there when you were younger... and I'm sorry, so let me make it up now."

His voice had so many emotions in it that it didn't comfort me at all, "I didn't need anyone when I was a kid," I replied, and I still don't need anyone, I could handle myself. He didn't take offence to it but he still didn't like what I had said, I wanted to tell him that I didn't need him now but that would be a lie because I knew that I really did. He moved in his seat, as if he had caught on to me pushing him away, "Vladimira..." He didn't know what to say and that was just fine, I rather liked the silence at the moment but it didn't continue. "You can't hold grudges against everyone forever." I looked up at him, "I don't have a grudge against anyone, I never had anything against anyone to begin with." It made me somewhat angry that he thought that I was an angry person, which is ironic but true none the less. He and Vikas and Dorian all wanted me to get revenge and they were the ones that had to stick their noses in my business, I was fine keeping it all to myself, without anyone having to find out. Otis was the one that wanted me to kill D'Ablo all those times, but I forgave him even though he didn't deserve it. He looked down at the table, he couldn't look at me while he spoke, his voice hushed and concerned but truthful, "Even yourself?"

I all but screamed as I stood up from the table and moved to leave, but he quickly was next to me, grabbing my arm in a way that didn't hurt but made me stop, nothing could make me look at him right now though. We stayed standing still, I've always hated myself for the thoughts that passed through my head about my father and about all the foster fathers, it had to have been something that I did, and it was who I am that made them act that way. But I still hated them and I wanted to kill them while I was there and I still can't think about them without getting mad, but mostly I hated myself for the simple fact that I wasn't and am still not strong enough to face it all- constantly letting it get to me. If I was stronger then nothing would ever be wrong and I wouldn't constantly let people down or make them feel like they failed somehow, like Otis being sorry about not being around when I was a kid, it wasn't his fault.

I had a solution, but that was killed while in Russia a few years ago, I promised Otis and Vikas that I would no longer do anything of the sort, but I wasn't so certain. I would stab myself in the leg for everything I ever did wrong and that I was sorry for, keeping it from Nelly because the only way that I would feel forgiven is if I killed myself. I asked her to stab me if she blamed me for anything but she was shocked and offended by my remark so I quickly lied to her telling her it was a bad joke but I told it wrong. I did it for Otis also, and almost Vikas but I was stopped by Tristan, I was sorry that they felt like they failed me and that I made them put their lives on hold because I couldn't face my life and survive alone, but mostly because I took away a sister and a brother and above all else their friends. That was a long week in Russia.

Otis still held my arm and I waited for him to say something, but he didn't, he knew that I never actually did forgive myself and I deserved not to, but taking away the stabbing made it that much harder to face, and all I wanted to do was just that. Finally he found the words he wanted to say, in a soft but strong voice he spoke, "You have to forgive yourself at some point," he pulled my arm a little, wanting me to turn around, but I wouldn't, I had no right to forgive myself especially after making Otis feel like that after he found out about the whole stabby thing, but still far before he even came in the picture I had no right. He pulled a little harder and met me halfway, letting go of my arm and embracing me in a hug, locking his arms around my shoulders, I couldn't see over his own so I just turned my head to the side and looked off. I didn't deserve his hug or his love and he just reminded me how much that I have that I don't deserve.

"You never answered my question..." I brought up, I asked him while in Russia why he was so nice to me, why he wanted to teach me things and get to know me, I was just a snot nosed kid to him that he never approved of. The only thing that we had in common was my father and I had stolen him away from Otis in several different ways, stealing him from Elysia, killing him, ruining Otis's idea's of the man with memories from my past. Otis had every right to hate me and disown me but he still stuck around, I knew he loved Nelly but he couldn't have just been nice to me to stay on good terms with her would he? He didn't let go of me, but he didn't understand the question, I heard his voice echo from his lungs as my ear was pressed against his chest, "What question?" Wishing both that he would pull me away and not because I couldn't face him but I couldn't be in his hold when he told me that he hated me. My voice was shaky and I was on the verge of tears because I could loose everything in one fell swoop again, "Why are you nice to me? Why do you stay around? Why do you keep coming back, 'cuz if its just to be around Nelly you don't need to suck up to her by being nice to me..." Then I asked the major question, "Why don't you say you hate me?"

He completely ignored me the first time I asked, but his reaction this time was somewhat the same, hurt, upset, appalled, and just over all unhappy. "Would you prefer I stayed away?" "No." I hated it when he was away; I just wanted to know why he always came back. He gave a small laugh at my sudden eagerness to answer his question, "Is there a reason that I should not be nice to you, or that I should hate you?" He combined that questions but both had the same answer, "yes..." my voice was hushed but he heard me loud enough, pulling me away from him, his hands on my shoulders, looking straight into my eyes, bending down a bit to do so. "And what reason was that?" He already knew why, I never asked him because I knew he would say he blamed me but I never had the guts to say it. "Because..." I started, I couldn't look him in the eyes, but every time I tried to look away he would make me look at him again, moving his head around. "Because..." I started again, there was a lump growing in my throat, "I mean... I..." I couldn't say it.

He was trying not to laugh at my none existent tongue, but I wasn't, he looked down while closing his eyes for a second then looked back up at me, care shown that I felt like if I asked would break like glass, but I had too. "Why?" He asked again, his voice also quiet now; if it was any louder I would have jumped and ran away. "Because..." I kept trying to add more but I couldn't, I took a step back, brushing his hands off my shoulders, facing him but looking away from him. "I…. I-... I took away your brother, your friend!" I had to scream it out otherwise it never would've come, the way he looked at me made me want to curl up in a ball and hide in a dark room, he didn't look hurt by my reason but he held sympathy in his eyes, sympathy for me for reasons I don't know. He slowly closed his eyes and then looked back into my own, placing his hands on my shoulders again, "Vladimira... that fire wasn't your fault..." he always said that, but had never proved anything. "Yeah, that's what you keep saying, yet they still aren't here." I felt more tears weld in my eyes but to my amazement I managed to keep them off my cheeks, "But still even before that."

Brushing his hands off again I took another step back, there was no way that he couldn't be mad at me, I was just waiting now for him to burst and be able to take everything without showing him how it would tear me up inside. But he remained silent, looking down, "Vladimira... Why do you want me to hate you?" _"I don't" _I quickly yelled back in my head, I went to say it out loud but my mouth prevented me, he took another step closer, forcing me to look down and step back. Wrapping my arms around my stomach to both help control my breathing and to try and get rid of the uncomfortable feeling in my body, slouching my shoulders a bit, trying to force back tears but knowing that soon I would loose.

I fell back, leaning against the wall and sliding down still cradling my stomach and bring my face down into my knees, trying to curl up to become as small as possible so that maybe I could _poof_ away. I did want him to hate me. I can't deal with this feeling, being forgiven, I know how to deal with hate and hurt but not this, and above all I was afraid to be happy- afraid to loose it all again. As he step towards me I quickly jumped up to my feet, heading for the door again still forcing my tears back I kept my head down. Grabbing my arm again he asked his question, "Why do I have to hate you?" his voice was loud but patient, it had to be loud now or I wouldn't be able to hear it over my own heart thumping in my ears, he pulled me again, spinning me around. "Why?" I yelled it loud so that my voice wouldn't sound shaky but it still managed to do so, yelling it was the only way that I could say it, "Because of everything! Because you should hate everything about me- about what I've done!"

My arms were no longer wrapped around my stomach but at my sides pleading with him to see my reason, tears still in my eyes but not falling down my face, I hated crying and I could always force back the tears, swallow my shame. He shifted his weight as if expecting me to try and run again, but I had already asked and now I just needed his response, his voice wasn't shaky at all but I could hear he was on the verge of tears, looking down at my feet, "Why should I hate you?" I shook my head, angry with his obviousness to my words, "I could never hate you. Even if I wanted to and even if I never met you Thomas loved you and that is enough for me." He looked up at me, I was shaking my head, pointing my finger at him and throwing my arms around, "The only reason he ever loved me was because I was his blood- That was it!"

I didn't mean to say I didn't love my father, because I did, but Otis seemed hurt by my words, although they were true on the surface, but I never wanted to look any deeper. "You know that's not true, it was never that simple." His head tipped to the side, angry that I was speaking so lowly of my father; I couldn't prove that my statement was true though… The last week I spent with him was the happiest of my life. "Yeah, well… It would be easier if it was." I turned to walk out the door but Otis quickly shut it and stood in front of me looking at me, with a look that said that this conversation wasn't over. "Why do I have to hate you?" I turned around, going to walk somewhere other then here whether outside or upstairs, "Because-" I started but quickly stopped speaking and walking when I was being choked by tears, Otis stood behind me still by the door, "Why?" He practically yelled it at me- cracking the façade I put up and I spun myself around, "Because I don't know how to deal with this!" I felt a tear slip down my cheek, which although it was only one meant so much more.

"I could handle it if you hated me- if everyone hated me- I would know what to do!" I felt more tears fall down my face, this was the first time I had never said it, aloud or in my head, "I don't know how to deal with people acting like they care!" I continued, and though it should have made me feel better it just made me feel worse, selfish. I wanted him to hate me so I could be happy, I wanted to take away everyone else's 'happiness' so I could know what to do, I threw my hands up. "And there, another reason, I'm a selfish brat." I turned back to walk away but Otis's voice rang in my ears, "How could you ever be selfish?" making me turn around to face him again, he had the look of sympathy on his face and I couldn't stand it, "Like last year! I was so worried about myself and D'Ablo, thinking that the reason you weren't around was because you finally came to your senses, I didn't even realize that you were being hurt until almost a year later!" I felt more tears fall down my face, he looked surprise, but then again this was the first he was hearing of it, the first anyone was.

"You didn't know about it. How could you have known?" He took a step away from the door, making me want to disappear but I couldn't even move my fingers anymore. Lifting my head from its view of the ground I looked up at him, "You sent me those memories- I should have figured it out!" He stomped towards me, grabbing me by the arms making me flinch thinking that he was going to be mad but instead his hold was gentle and instead, he was upset. "How could you have known?" Otis seemed to be repeating his questions a lot today, but yet every time I gave him a different answer, "I should have figured it out!" I tried to walk away but his hold was too secure, "Vikas couldn't figure it out either, so was it his fault?" He picked up my shoulder a bit, moving me so I would look back into his eyes, "Of course it wasn't-" a sad smile met his lips, in his mind he won and he cut me off, "Then how is it your's?" It didn't matter what he said, I would still continue to blame myself even though he felt like he was getting through to me.

I tried to wiggle free from his hands, but he kept his hold on me and kept moving me so I could look nowhere but his eyes, feeling another tear slip down my face, he was also crying but the tears paused for a moment, "Do you really feel that it would be easier if I hated you?" The tone in his voice suggested it was a rhetorical question, but I gave him an answer while trying to back away again, but not yelling like before, "I would know what to do." I didn't want him to hate me but at the same time I did. I dropped my head down to look at my feet, tears began to fall again and I couldn't subside them, my whole body was shaking and my shoulders trembling in his hands. He let go of my arms and wrapped me in his embrace again, my head pressed against his chest but I couldn't move, I didn't know what to do. I hated feeling like this, but I was afraid to feel any other way.

His chest slowly rose and deflated, shaking all along the way as he silently cried, I continued to try and hide my tears, but they kept coming, I rubbed my face with my sleeves, trying to get rid of the tears but as soon as they were gone new ones had already taken their place. His voice was a whisper, but loud enough for me to break down in tears, "…You don't have too…" I felt a waterfall of tears fall down my face, crashing to the ground, I buried my head in his chest, wrapping my arms around my waist again, not bothering to wipe away the tears any more. His sobs reached my ears and I felt even worse, I was making one of the people I care most about in the world cry and with that thought alone it made it worse- I had to fix this, I slowly let go of myself, grabbing and squeezing the sides of his shirt in my shaking hands. A small laugh left his throat and he leaned his head down, kissing my hair and squeezing my shoulders tighter, I was finally able to hug my uncle for the first time, I slowly looped my arms around him, grabbing at his loosely tucked in dress shirt and holding him as tight as I could.

I didn't hug people; I didn't like that sort of human interaction. While I was a kid I did, but once I lost my mother it all changed and I couldn't stand it, though I know it hurts Nelly when I try to avoid any type of interactions but I try to suffer through them for her. For the first time since I was 10, I actually chose to touch someone, not to push them away or to sturdy myself, but because I wanted to. I heard Otis give a small laugh, "The first hug my niece gives away after 6 years is to me," He lifted one of his hands and sat it on the back of my head, "I am blessed...Hopefully, the first of many." I let out a small laugh trying to stop crying, I missed holding someone close to me, I was hoping he wouldn't tell Nelly because I didn't want her to get upset with me if I couldn't find myself to hug her. But she deserves it, she's been so nice to me and she hasn't pressured me to talk to her which while I needed it at some points, I didn't want it.

We sat in the living room; I sat in the chair sideways, my knees up and against my cheeks with my hands twisted around to hold the bottoms of my feet, hiding myself in my hoodie with my two shirts still on the ground in the kitchen. I would have to hurry and move before Nelly got home unless I wanted to talk to her about what actually happened but I didn't really want to move. Otis was on the couch, halfway between laying and sitting, flipping through channels on TV. He asked that I stay downstairs and keep him company, speaking for a tiny bit here and there about something that we just saw, mostly him talking though. I fell asleep yet again, not meaning too but it was so easy too, I felt extremely light and for a few short moments I had a clear conscious so I let sleep take me over.

I slowly opened my eyes to look around and see that the living room light was off along with the TV but there was a light glaring in from the kitchen, looking over my shoulder to see the light and hear two soft voices. Someone covered me up, a blanket that wrapped around from my back over my shoulder and around my knees covering me where I wasn't touching the piece of furniture. It wasn't completely dark outside but it was darker then when I had slipped to sleep, by my judge about an hour or so later, I rotated my body, sliding my feet off the chair to lightly touch the floor. Folding the blanket and setting it on the arm of the chair I silently walked to the kitchen, pulling my hood up to hide the back of my neck and pulling my sleeves over my hands, bunching the openings into a ball in my fists, folding my arms in front of me.

Hair covering part of my face, I slowly popped up in the kitchen, leaning against the doorjamb, trying to stay unnoticeable for as long as possible which wasn't very long. I noticed Nelly sitting in the chair and Otis standing, he was doing most of the talking though I wasn't sure what they were talking about, Otis had his arms folded in front of him like me but something told me that it wasn't because he was cold too. I watched Otis but he wasn't the first to speak to me, his face looked like he was having a very serious and difficult conversation, he was staring straight ahead of him, past Nelly though, her voice sounded as though she was forcing a happy tone, "Vladimira! You're finally up." She turned her body to me, her eyes looked as though she was trying to force back tears and that she had been crying, "Yeah..." I said slowly, standing more in the kitchen now, looking back and fourth from Otis to Nelly, "What are you guys talking about?"

They were silent at first, that along with everything else told me it wasn't something pleasant, I moved the chair to the side and sat in it not resting my arms on the table but keeping them to myself incase I decided that I wanted to bolt out of there. Nelly looked back to Otis, who was still staring off into the wall, following her gaze I looked from Otis and then back to her waiting for one of them to start talking. But they didn't, they were going to tell me whatever they were talking about otherwise Nelly quickly would have lied something up, Otis stood up straight, placing one hand on his hip and rubbing his head with the other, "Another time," he caught off the conversation he was having with Nelly, "do you want to join me in my trip to New York?" He looked over in my direction, something was still bothering him but he was trying to push it off. "Yeah... when?"

He came down and sat in the chair between me and Nelly most seriousness from the previous conversation erased, "Later this month, only for three nights, a brief visit with a friend of mine." He looked up at me, a half smile on his lips and I returned the smile, looking over to Nelly to see if she agreed, her eyes were kind and her smile sweet making me feel like something was going to happen and she knew that this would make me happy till then- not a very comforting feeling. We sat in silence for a few seconds and I found myself looking down at the table waiting for one of them to begin speaking again but they didn't, raising my head up slightly I noticed that they were both staring at me. "What...?" I looked from Otis to Nelly wondering if maybe I had something on my face or if maybe she still wanted to yell at me, I looked back to Otis and back to Nelly but neither said anything. Nelly smiled and stood up, "Nothing," She placed a hand on Otis's shoulder and looked at me, "You hungry?"

I smiled at her and shook my head no, she slowly walked out of the dining room watching her leave I turned back to look at Otis who was giving me a concerned glance. "What?" I asked again, some-what jumping by the sudden change in his demeanor, his voice was casual with a slight hint of his glance, "You haven't eaten anything since I arrived." He watched me waiting to hear my response, I wasn't going to lie to him though, "I ate before I went to school..." His look didn't change, "Not very hungry." I quickly added waiting to see his reaction hoping that he would drop the subject. He placed his arms on the table, resting his head on his folded hands that were now in front of his face, he continued to stare at me, I didn't want to leave but the silence was annoying and off putting. "What were you guys talking about?"

I met his gaze but I didn't see anything reflect in his eyes to show what he was thinking, he placed his hand on my shoulder as he stood up, walking out to where Nelly had gone, he didn't want to tell me but he didn't like not telling me, so I decided to drop the subject as he kissed the top of my head and found Nelly. I stood up and found my way upstairs, they clearly weren't going to tell me, and I had a strange craving for food but it was a nauseating thought, and I was still tired. As I made my way to my bedroom I felt so alone, a cold emptiness that pierced up my heart, I didn't understand why though, Nelly and Otis were in the kitchen... but then again it wasn't the only thing that was really getting to me. I closed the door to my bedroom, leaning against it for a second before pushing myself off it and towards my bed, not bothering to turn on the light because I would be sleeping soon anyway. I fell on my bed, still only having a blanket on it, but it was more than comfy, I was lying on my stomach, my feet hanging over the edge of the bed as my hand slithered up and sat under the weight of my head. It had been such a long day, but it appeared that it wasn't going to dissolve into sleep and tomorrow yet.

I cold breeze tickled the hairs that fell on the back of my neck, causing me to lift my head and turn over to lay on my side, facing my door, my hand still under my head, ignoring the pain from the now smaller bruises on my wrists and neck. I was still asleep but I slowly awoke when I rose a little on the bed as another weight was placed on it, I didn't feel like moving though so I kept my eyes closed and tried to go back to bed. Something pressed the bed in front of my stomach, rubbing against my hip and stomach in the process, slowly I opened my eyes, feeling a fogginess in my head still, I tried to focus my eyes on what this was, an arm. I would have jumped if I had enough energy, but I didn't, so I just slowly rolled my head back followed the arm to a shoulder, a shoulder to a neck and then to a face, though it was dark I was able to see small distinct features and I instantly knew who it was, Dorian. I let out a groan, returning my head to how it was, wrapping my hands around my head so I could try to go back to sleep, hoping that maybe this was just a dream, but after I finally managed to force my eyes open and stay open I realized that this must not be a dream, which means I really need to get up. He was sitting on my bed with his arm pressed to the front side of me, blocking me in, I would've rolled my entire body over but his side was pressed against my back after I moved just a few inches, I noticed a smile on his lips, he didn't plan on moving. I stayed laying under him, I was in no mood to put up a fight or to be anything but sleeping, briefly wondering as to why he was here, but then not really caring.

"That's not very nice." His voice sent a shiver down my spine, his voice was smooth and effortless, I didn't understand at first but then I remembered that he was reading my mind… again. "I came all the way out here, and you don't care if I'm here?" he leaned a little closer, forcing another shiver to go down my spine and goose bumps to form on my covered arms. "I'm sorry…" I didn't want him to think that I didn't care- that he wasn't important, "I'm just tired…" I added, I still felt sorry about my yelling at him this morning and saying what I had said, basically bitching at him, I waited for his reply but he didn't say anything, instead I watched as a smile grew on his face. "What?" I thought maybe I had something on my face, thinking that he was laughing at me, but he shook his head as I brought my arm up to wipe my face, softly he grabbed my wrist and I didn't even notice his hold till I couldn't move my arm anymore. Looking up at him I waited for him to say something, hoping that he wasn't planning on draining me of blood again or killing me- I wasn't in the mood to die, but his smile only stayed on his face and I heard a small laugh. "I don't believe that people are ever in that mood." He leaned a little closer again and I started to push into the bed, more of his side was touching my side and his arm was now pressed against my stomach and hip- resting on it. Freezing, he sensed that I wasn't very comfortable with what he was doing- that I didn't know what he was doing exactly, he kept his distance but didn't back up, after a few moments of silence when I assumed he wasn't going to move any closer I asked him a question, "Why exactly are you here?" Smiling like that was the thousand dollar question he leaned closer and whispered in my ear, his face brushing against mine, "To see you."

I almost blushed, I tried to swallow it but I knew my face still turned a little red, he pulled back a little, holding his face only a few inches from my own, staring into my eyes, a smile on his face, I was thinking that maybe he didn't really come to see me but instead just to taste my blood, he leaned back a little more. "Why?" I asked out loud, why not just ask instead of assume, he was silent for a little while, so I assumed it was just for my blood, but his voice came out soft and caring, "Just to see you." I gave him a questioning glance and he just smiled again, "You're not going to drink my blood?" I noticed he still had his hand gently holding my wrist with his fingers fitting into the groves of the bruises but not hurting, he shifted a little closer and leaned back down, "Not unless you want me to." He laughed, but for some reason I only felt more blood rush to my face, he kept his face next to me which only made me blush more because I felt him give a small laugh- his breath sliding through my ear and pushing my hair around, when he felt my cheek get warmer. After a few short seconds he sat back up slightly, looking at my face but I was frozen, I had no idea what to say to him or what to do, his arm was still on my side and while I didn't like human contact I strangely wanted him to keep his arm around my waist, but I made sure not to think it.

Trying to slide up and out of his hold- to sit up, I raised my arm but quickly fell off it when I realized that my still bruised wrist couldn't take that kind of pressure so instead I was forced to lean on my elbow, which didn't allow me to slide out but instead push me tighter into his grasp. Sitting there for a few minutes I waited for him to move but he didn't, I waited for him to say something but he didn't, I had no idea what to say or do so I just sat still and stared into his eyes, although he was looking at me our eyes never met, as if he was admiring my face, which made me drop my head back down and be smothered in the mattress and blanket as soon as I thought that he was looking at my face. Face down in the bed with one arm pulled up to my side, I blushed at the slight thought but I wasn't safe in my mind so I couldn't think anything which only made me that less sure of what to do, I felt him shift on my bed. Leaning closer his breath moved the hairs on the back of my neck, his hand sliding up a little on the bed so his arm could bend around my waist, "We don't have to do anything Vladimira." He pulled his arm tighter so it was no longer rested against my hoodie but now pressing against my actual solid form, his warmth seeping through the fabric, I blushed again- why did I keep blushing, normally I would freak out and push them away, but blush? Not my normal reaction. His hand slithered into the bed and before I could realize his hand was holding my ribcage, he flipped me over so I was now mostly on my back but my body now tipped toward him. Feeling my face staring to get warmer I tried to act cool, "So, this is not doing anything?" his hand was still at my side though I barely noticed its hold on my hip, he finally brought his other hand back into my vision and set his hand next to my head and leaned forward again, whispering into my right ear now, "Mhm. This is not doing anything." His voice was quiet so it didn't vibrate my ear drum but it was almost too quiet and I almost missed it, his voice sounded restrained, I felt my face getting warm again, "… What's doing something then?" the feeling he gave off spoke as if something ticked, breathing closer to my neck now, moving his head down a bit he pressed something soft and moist against my neck, right behind my jaw bone, I could feel his almost uneasy breaths escape his nose, slowly opening his mouth and lightly pressing his normal teeth against the still wet area. Pulling the skin on my neck into his mouth, his hand squeezing a bit harder on an area around my hip, I felt a small warmth shoot up my body. My face got another shade of pink as he began to suck at the skin on my neck, I noticed that his hand was actually on my bare hip, pushing his thumb at an area that dropped off the bone- sinking in pretty deep because I had very prominent hip bones. My heart beat began to rise but I stayed still, still a bit too unsure as to what to do, I felt him hold his breath for a second and then quickly begin breathing again, his thumb rotating it's pressure on my hip as his other hand pushed harder into the bed, then quickly was against my side, pressing against my rib and sliding down it, sliding off my side and onto my actual stomach his hand kept going lower and lower.

Dorian's body was trembling, along with random little tremors from my own body, his hand sliding down my rib tightly and then almost unnoticeable over my outer stomach till I felt his hand slide a little under my pants as he grabbed my other hip, causing my hip to jump back a little and press into the bed which only made my back arch a bit into him. At some point Dorian went from lightly pressing his upper body against me, just barely noticeable, to his left knee lying flat between my own knees while his right knee stayed bent up a little and outside my left knee. Slowly straightening his knee his body was pressed against mine as he dug his fingers into my hips and his mouth slid down my neck, biting at the base of my neck to almost my shoulder, on the un-bruised side, my right side. Not using his vampire teeth though, he pulled at the skin lightly, sending small shakes to wither up my body, blushing while my hips randomly jerked back, feeling his own hips rolling against my leg, he was pushing his feet against my bed to push harder onto me as his thumbs moved in a little and down a bit more, pushing a little softer but the effect still felt the same to me. Twitching, my back arched into him again and he quickly slid across my skin and up to my mouth, pressing his lips against my own, his eyes squeezed close while mine remained half closed, his tongue sliding over my bottom lip and pushing against it as if expecting to get further, but I didn't open my mouth. His hands let go of my hips reluctantly and moved to the center of where they were placed, his fingertips just barely reaching my belly button, his hands flat on my waist as they began to slowly slide up my stomach, under my shirts. Once he reached about the middle of my stomach his hands spread a bit and wrapped around my ribs and held me from the back, still pressing into my lips, his placed his hands in the center of my bare back, knowing that his fingers were resting on my scars made my mouth open a tiny bit- to try to tell him to stop. But once my mouth lost its lock I felt his tongue slide into my own mouth, it shot in at first- pushing against my teeth and my own tongue, bringing my hands up I pushed against his collar bones, trying to get him off, but he only pressed against me harder. He was pushing his fingers into my back, catching on the scarred but smooth skin while he also bit my lip, "_Ow_" I thought, and he froze, my eyes were squeezed shut but once his tongue stopped moving, along with everything else, I slowly unclenched them and opened my eyes to look and see that his own eyes were open and watching my face again. His eyes were half open as if he was about to sleep and his hands slowly slid off my back and pulled out from under my shirt, while his tongue was still in my mouth, but as soon as his hands were resting on my thighs- over the pants, I pulled my head away, turning back onto my side, bringing my knees up a little and folding my arms so my forearms rose and covered my still a bit red face. Staying still for a few seconds I was hoping that maybe he would decide to just leave, although I didn't really want him to leave- blushing once I realized that he probably heard that, I turned my head into the bed more and pushed my folded arms harder against my face, the skin around my hips hurt now and it felt like they were bruised along with my tongue now.

Dorian leaned over me again, but I tried to not get any closer, not if he was going to shove his tongue back down my throat and give me any more bruises, but I ran out of places to sink into, I felt his breath on my hands, he began to move the hair off the part of my now flushed face, without moving my hands though. His movements were slow but I noticed that my arms were moving as he held my wrists and turned me so I couldn't hide in the bed anymore, but I couldn't look at him, his weight shifted as his face was closing in on my own, squeezing my lips shut to brace myself while pushing my head into the bed, wanting to turn back over but he held my wrists softly against my shoulders, still trying to squirm free I shook my head a little, but he didn't press his lips against my own this time. Instead I felt his lips press against the middle of my forehead, slowly I loosened my squeezing lips and let my head just rest on the bed, blood flow returned to my face though I wasn't blushing. Softly his lips left my forehead and he opened his eyes to look into my own as his face was inches above my almost blushing face, I didn't want him to leave. I noticed a small smirk on his lips, his dark yet light eyes half open still, his voice soft, deep, and quiet, "Let's not do anything…" although I wasn't smiling I nodded, noticing that his hands were still holding my arms loosely and slowly they let go and sunk into the bed at the sides of my shoulders but my wrists still stayed on my shoulders. "That was the plan…. I just want to sleep." I said, trying to erase the funny feeling that was still there after everything he pulled, his eyes closed as he smiled, "Then that's what we shall do." Before I processed what he had said, I was on my side again, my arms folded against my chest loosely as his body pressed against my backside, his arms wrapped around me, his head tipped against my own with his feet interlocking with mine, I felt blood rushing to my face. I went to speak but he spoke before I could, "Sleep now… You have school in the morning." His voice sounded a bit disappointed when he added the last part, "I'm sorry." My voice quiet and smooth, I didn't now exactly why I was sorry but he seemed… upset? With me and I didn't know what else to do or say, so I stayed still, my face returning to normal temperature. Keeping my eyes open I looked at the edge of the bed, this felt extremely strange- not good but not bad, but my mind didn't want to think but I still didn't let it rest, Dorian's voice came in soft and quiet as he pulled me a little closer, "You should sleep… your body's still tired." My eyes closed a little to his voice but I forced sleep to hold on, at least for as long as I could stay out of its clutches, "I don't know why, I slept all day." My voice wasn't as soft as his but just as quiet, I felt him give a small laugh. "I know."

Forcing my eyes open, my eyebrows moved to a questioning glace although he couldn't see, "How do you know?" I should have felt creeped out but I didn't, "I was around you all day, from your sleeping in classes, the office, to here on the couch and your bed." The edges of my cheeks go a little warm but I didn't try to hide it, "Do you know who brought me to my bed?" I was really hoping that it wasn't Otis, when he finds me safe but unconscious he tends to stare at bruises and watch my mind. "I would hope… It was me." His voice was so matter of fact but I felt my face grow hotter, sliding my knees up a little, my feet sliding up his legs, my voice came out quiet but smooth, "Thank you…" I felt awkward now, if he could see my face I would probably be apologizing that something that most people see as simple, but I didn't, I would be blushing at, I felt him take a deep breath and when he exhaled it moved the hair around on my back of my neck. Forcing a shiver to go down my spine, when he felt me give a small shake he stopped breathing for a second, "I'm sorry…" his silence was making me feel like an idiot and a pervert, though I wasn't really being perverted, he nuzzled his face closer into the side and back of my head, holding me a bit tighter, "No…" his voice was even softer now and I wanted to turn over and look at him, hoping that I didn't offend him or anything but he continued, "Sleep." My eyelids started to flutter shut, the sudden need to stay awake and my eyes were slowly closing, my muscles slowly relaxing against him, but before I was completely blocked off from the world I heard his voice another time. "You really are too adorable."


	3. An Annoying Morning

My crusted eyes slowly opened, the painful dream I had had was leaving me and the hurt it brought with it was disappearing, my eyes only open about halfway I tried to pull my hand up to wipe off my face but there was something in my fingers, looking down I saw that my arms were crossed across my chest, shadows of his own arms with his big hands holding my hands. I didn't want to get up, to leave this warmth that I strangely only wanted to stay near, I couldn't tell if he was awake or not, but I decided to stay still for a little while longer, or until he woke up. His fingers gave a small squeeze on my own as he woke up, causing me to give a small smile. His head tipped down and laid against my ear and his forehead pressed into my still bruised neck, I tried to look at him but the corner of my eye blocked my vision, he took a deep breath and when he released it I thought that maybe he wasn't actually awake yet. I went to move but a small pain shot across my waist, causing a very small noise to escape me in the surprise of pain, as if on cue his hands slid from my own and wrapped around my ribcage, pulling me against him tighter as his head rubbed against my shoulder. I didn't move, knowing that it was probably about three, maybe four o'clock in the morning and I would have to get in the shower and all that before school, so I let him stay like that for a little before attempting to slip out of his arms. But once I tried to move away he held tighter, I gave a small smile and reached down, placing one hand on his own as I now tried to pull of his arms, but he only squeezed more, I let out a sigh. I was able to turn around though, I was now facing him, but he still held my ribs tight, his head was tipped and pressed against my collar bones now. "Dorian…" I started but once I noticed exactly what he was doing I felt a kind of sadness wash over me.

There were tears in his eyes and at that moment I noticed that he wasn't holding on to me because he just felt like it, he was holding onto me because he didn't want me to leave. When he was awake he looked and acted like a cold, refrained, cynical, possessive, and over all intimating and threatening person, but right now he looked like a small abandoned unloved child, all I wanted to do was hold him till that side of Dorian stopped emanating sadness, but I still had to get up. Raising my arms I held him, placing my arms on his shoulders, "Dorian… I have to get up… You have to let go of my waist…" my words were slow but I didn't want to wake him up, just get him to not cling to my stomach for at least an hour, I felt him take a deep breath, he was awake now, he tipped his head back so it was now resting on the bed again, his eyes closed, okay… maybe half awake. I tried to slide his hands off again. But his arms squeezed harder, except this time they were on my hips and he squeezed the bruises, I quickly drew my eyes shut and pressed against him to stop the cry from leaving my throat, my hands were almost shaking because of the sudden wave of pain, setting off all my other bruises with it for some reason, I couldn't take it so I pulled his arms back up to my ribs. Laying there I noticed that he was still sleeping, I would have no choice but to wake him if I wanted to wriggle free, but he looked so peaceful when my hands were around him, I leaned closer, pressing my head against his chest, my ear pressed to hear his heart as my arms wrapped around him, I could at least give him a few minutes to feel like this. After about 30 minutes I looked back up, he looked peaceful still, but I would have to wake him, if only for a few seconds, I let go of his back and pushed away from him a little, my arms now on his chest, I tapped where his heart was,

"Dorian…"

_tap tap tap_

"Dorian…. I have to get up…" polyp

_tap tap tap_

"Dorian…hey, wake up…"

Sadly I got nowhere; he only pulled his head down a little and was now facing me, I watching him for a second, his golden reddish hair parted to reveal softly closed eyes. Reaching one of my hands up I placed my hand on his cheek, "Dorian…" I continued, it was still dark out and I had already said his voice about five times and he still wasn't up, he was a very heavy sleeper, not what I thought he was.

…. "They don't even hurt anymore." I tried to convince him, grabbing on to my wrist and hiding the pain that shot up my body, but he didn't stop giving me that look, so I let out a sigh, trying to act oblivious still, "Show me… You know what I'm talking about." I let out another sigh and looked up at him, he looked like that he was still hurt but trying to push it away, slowly I slid my cold fingers to hook on my waist band and pulled it over, not looking at his face to see his reaction. The floor squeaked as he shifted his weight, I couldn't tell if he was mad or upset with himself or if he was mad at me, but I felt his fingers slide to clamp softly on my chin and gently tipped my head back so I was forced to look into his eyes, "I'm sorry." I never would have heard his quiet voice if I wasn't watching his lips, "Sorry for what?" it wasn't that big of a deal, just some small bruises, it's not like I haven't got worse from D'Ablo, his hand twitched on my chin when I thought about D'Ablo breaking my ribs and all the blood that he had drained from me in the few years I had even known who he was. "I never meant to hurt you…" He was quiet but his voice was comforting, I lightly shook my head and pulled my head out of his grasp as I looked straight ahead again, "It doesn't hurt, didn't you hear me?" I could deal with it, it would heal and then I wouldn't even be able to remember the pain, but he didn't stop when I wanted him to. He cupped my face in his hands as he made me look back up to him, "I'm sorry… I would never want to hurt you…" his comment confused me, "So… killing me doesn't hurt?" his face looked more hurt and more upset and as soon as the words slipped from my lips I regretted saying them, I didn't hate Dorian, I had no reason to but I didn't want him saying things like _I would never want to hurt you _or _I never meant to _because I already had enough to deal with on that level, I didn't need anymore fake promises or meaningless words. Dorian was further from me now, as if trying to distant himself, and I thought that maybe he really was mad at me and me being a bitch to him just made it so he couldn't hide it anymore, "If all you want to do is drink my blood… It's not like I could really stop you, so you don't have to try and be all nice or act like you care…" I turned to the mirror and started to wash my face, trying not to sound like I didn't cared all that much, and why should I? I noticed in the mirror before I felt anything. Dorian was behind me, his arms wrapped around my waist and wrapping up to hold my shoulders, his face buried in my hair and neck, breathing on my skin, his body pressed against me. The warmth spread from his body to mine, he felt like he was human with his warmth but he wasn't so I didn't really know why he always seemed so warm to me, all he wanted was my blood and yet he was still clinging to me and acting like he cared, if he kept going I would be stupid enough to start to believe him. "I'm sorry…I try to stop… but I lose control and I end up hurting you, I'm sorry…" His voice vibrated against my throat, I didn't want him to let go but I needed him too, slithering around I pushed him off, trying to act busy but failing miserably, "I don't like being away from you… please don't think my words mean nothing. I mean all of my words." I wasn't looking at him, I was now sitting painfully on the floor with clothes on the ground trying to act like I was looking for a shirt that I had accidently thrown in there, with some clothes on my lap, I couldn't think anymore to try to act busy. "I do… It's not for the blood… It's not to tear you apart… It's not to ruin you… It's because I mean it and I don't try to hurt you but I lost myself for a short while- because I want to be around you- because I'm not use to having to restrain myself, but if that's what I have to do to be with you then I will." I dropped my head, and Dorian answered my question allowed, "Yes… Vladimira- I'm saying that I love you." His stepped towards me but before he could hug me or hold me or any of that I stood up and tried to slip past him, but he put up his hands and grabbed my arms. "Let go…" I couldn't deal with this, not this early and in general- ever. "Please… Don't say that." Dorian was looking at me but I couldn't look up at him, I stared at the ground hoping that there was someway that I could scurry away but I didn't, part of me wanted to be able to be with him and feel love again but the other- the smart part of me knew that it was never that simple and it is easier to stay away from any type of love then risk feeling it for even a second. My arms were wiggling, to try to get away and to try to hide my shaking, but he pulled me over and hugged me, my head leaning against his chest trying to pry away while my mind fought, and I knew he could see it all so I was trying to hide it, just waiting for him to laugh and say that he couldn't believe that I actually thought that someone could say those types of things to someone like me. But all he did was hold me tighter and make me look up at him, I tried more to pull away, pushing against his chest, my hands sliding against his shirt and getting me nowhere further from him. My vision blurred a little as tears started to form in my eyes, "No." I had to reject love, I couldn't face having these feelings- the only other people I ever loved I lost, and that's what would happen here if he actually meant what he said and I still didn't know if he did mean any of it. He would leave and I would never see him again, but I still knew that he didn't mean what he was saying, I just wanted him to mean it, I just wanted everything he said to be true and it wouldn't matter if it was or not because if he said it again I would break and truth wouldn't matter. "Vladimira… Please, trust me…" I stopped fighting against him, but not because he took control of my body, but because he was the first person to ever ask me to trust them, no one ever asked me and seemed to never care if I did or not. '_Fine'_, I thought, I would trust him and believe every word that he told me and when he laughed or he vanished it would be my own stupid fault and there would be nothing I could do but suck it up. His face slowly lit up with happiness and a small genuine smile touched his lips, he forced me to look back up at him and he leaned down pressing his lips against my own, both of our eyes closed and when we opened them he shook his head, "Yes… I am asking to be your boyfriend…. And for you to be my girlfriend." My face blushed a little that he was still reading my mind, I was silent for a small while as he leaned back down and kissed my lips, after a few minutes I finally found my voice again, "Kay… I have two rules though." I watched his face to see whether or not he was going to say okay then I'm gone, or what makes you think I'll follow them, but he gave me neither, instead he waited for me to say what I wasn't thinking. "First: no more reading my mind… it's embarrassing." I blushed a little and he smiled while a small laugh escaped, "Alright, I shall respect that rule and I will respect your thoughts and not invade your privacy." I let out a breath and smiled at him and then I held up my hand, holding up two fingers. "And rule number two…. No drinking human blood." That was a big thing to take, but he didn't seem all that shocked to hear me say it, "While I'm here?" He asked simply, I didn't understand what he meant, "Well… when I am not here I do not have access to food other then directly from the source." I never thought about that, that raised a couple questions in my mind but I pushed them away, "Kay… Then… no killing anyone, or almost killing them." That seemed like a better rule, "And how you do you expect me to keep the vampire race a secret?" I don't think he didn't like not being able to read my mind, "Erase their memories," I said simply, "You're a strong enough vampire, you could manage it." I smiled closing my eyes which only surprised me more when he leaned back down and pressed his lips against my own again, pulling me harder against him, slowly tipping his head away he looked at me, his voice serious, "I'll manage it." I smiled, I couldn't help but feel special that he was actually going to listen to the rules, while they sounded easy I knew that they weren't, even for Otis the second one was difficult. "I have to finish getting ready for school." A smile still on my face as I turned around to look at the mirror, Dorian still clinging to me, even though I said the word school the smile didn't fade. I slowly shifted my weight and noticed that my hips really hurt, I would have to take some pain killers if I wanted to be able to survive all day, especially since I would have to walk to school today because Henry would be going to an appointment first, only the second day of school and he already managed to skip out. Dorian looked at me with a concerned face, as if sensing my pain, "I'm fine." I lied, softly pulling his hands away to stand on my own and actually get stuff done, but he still saw through it, I put my hand on the door as if signaling that I was going to shut it and he had to go find someone else to bug for right yet, but he looked reluctant and I thought he would never leave. Finally he smiled and turned to walk back to my room it looked like and I shut the door, a smile still on my face, I had a boyfriend- a vampire boyfriend… I began to think about what Otis said to me, to stay away from Dorian… how would he take this?

Jumping in the shower I looked down at my bruised body, the scars that masked and tangled, twisting around the front of my legs, for the first time in a long time I felt special and the scars only reminded me that I was really stupid and then doubt myself a little more at the thought that maybe he really didn't like me or anything like he said, after all I had only known him for a little over 2 days… and in most of the times I was sleeping or passed out. I slowly got out of the shower not wanting to face him but wanting to be near him, whether to hear his lies or as he said truths, I wanted to be near him again. After brushing my teeth and my hair, after getting completely dressed for school, hiding some of the bruises with bracelets they were still in the process of becoming nothing but still managed to hurt, I walked out of the bathroom. Walking across the hall and into my room I grabbed my shoes and socks and sat on my bed, wondering if Dorian left or if maybe he stayed around and was roaming around the house. Getting off the bed, I slowly walked downstairs, hiding the pain incase Dorian popped up, but once I reached the kitchen I assumed that Dorian wasn't around. Reaching into the cabinet I pulled out a bottle labeled Tylenol and popped the cover, though what was inside was not Tylenol, it was stronger and addicting but numbed the body, Vicadin. I swallowed the pill and was surprised to turn around and see Dorian again, standing in the doorway, looking at me like he was trying to figure out what I was thinking without breaking the first rule. I tried to act like I didn't just swallow a pill but he caught on pretty quick, his face soften as he raised his hand to brush my cheek but I quickly moved, pretending I didn't see him reaching for my face, "You hungry?" I turned back around to look at him, he needed to eat and I wasn't sure if he would feel comfortable just reaching into a freezer to take food, but then again it was Dorian… but then again, he was very different when I was around. I watched his somewhat long hair shift as he shook his head softly, walking towards me again, his hand still in the air but now pressing against my chest like he originally planned; I tried to not over react or anything, "What?" the words came out hushed as he leaned against me again and pressed his lips against my forehead, I closed my eyes halfway, enjoying it but trying not to, I couldn't be sure yet and not that I wasn't trying to believe him but I wasn't sure if he was completely telling the truth when he said that he didn't like hurting me, not wanting to end up having to hide more bruises, I didn't mind the pain, just trying to hide it was the problem. His neck slowly straightened as he pulled his lips away and looked down at me, his deep dark eyes peering as if they were glowing, and they started to close again as he leaned back down and I felt something warm and moist press against my almost closed mouth. My eyes shut and I wasn't sure if I was surprised or relieved that he didn't force his tongue back into my mouth, but I felt my lips get wetter as his tongue did slide around my bottom lip, his clothed arms slowly finding their way around my own covered arms and holding my back, pushing me against him although softly, he seemed like he was getting taller as my head tipped further and further back but his lips stay connected with mine, my head tipped all the way back while my body was still straight- almost, other then where Dorian was pulling me against him, I felt his breathes get deeper and shorter, but I didn't bother to open my eyes to look at him. His fingers started to push into my back, picking me up slightly as his lips pushed harder against mine and his tongue slid around my bottom lip faster, I opened my mouth a tiny bit more and I felt his tongue slide against my teeth, hitting the gums and slithering around as if searching my mouth, remembering last night. Last night when he did this it didn't- but almost, hurt, it didn't taste right, but right now he wasn't being as mean and he was actually being gentle- it tasted sweet. I loosened my own tongue and let his slide against it, slowly pulling me closer and closer to him, we had already been touching from the beginning but it was as if he was trying to merge me with him, I liked feeling Dorian's touch, pinned between a counter and him, slightly pushing against the counter till I almost couldn't breath and let go, letting my pale and frail hands slide up Dorian's clothed arm to rest on his shoulder as he continued to press harder against my much frailer body. My lunar hands connected around, holding lightly onto the back of his lightly tanned neck as he kissed hard and his tongue moved faster, I decided to kiss back for the first time, and his body gave a slight shake and he instantly pressed harder against me while my tongue slipped into his mouth over his own, exploring his mouth for the first time. I felt one of Dorian's hands slide up a bit and wrap on to my shoulder, as if trying to pull me down while his other arm held me up, his lean body began to press against mine like his breathing, quickly close and then just as quickly loosened, repeating this as if trying to force me away but not wanting to. Heat was seeping through his clothes as he pressed himself against me in short pulses, his tongue moving quicker and quicker around my mouth, then slowly his head started to tip to the side while he lightly kissed down my cheek to kiss behind my jaw and down my neck. Opening my eyes slowly I looked up at the ceiling still as I didn't bother to move my head, tipping my head to the side though to allow him to press harder against my still lightly bruised skin. Spurts of liquid fire shooting up my body while an almost disgusted feeling washed over me, Dorian was causing all but the disgusted part, I didn't like human interaction but I found myself in love with his touch, ever since he first set his hand on my chin, but I felt disgusted with myself that I was allowing him to feel like he said for me.

Bringing my hand down I sat them on his chest and started to push against him, not wanting to push him away but not wanting allow him to go any further, saying things that I didn't want him to regret and that I didn't want to hear while I knew all the while that it couldn't be possible for him to like me because I had only known him for such a short while. Dorian didn't stop though, he only pressed his moist lips harder against my skin and his body harder against my own, but his head stopped sliding down my neck and was now sucking at the skin on my collar bone, I could feel my skin getting nipped at by his still human teeth. Unfortunately my voice wasn't on my side and wouldn't talk to him to get him to stop, but instead only a small cry came out when I felt his teeth press against my skin, nothing more then a small press that didn't even break the skin but he held his hold and all I wanted was to push him away. I tried to yell at him in my mind but then I remembered that I had told him not to read my mind and almost on cue as I went to speak he picked his head up and pressed his lips against my own and before I could close my mouth his tongue slithered inside. Slowly opening my eyes I tried to meet his eyes but his own eyes were closed and I noticed that my face was blushing, I tried to pull my head away, tried to tip my head down to escape him but he felt me start to pull and instead just cradled the back of my head in his hand as he pushed my head against him and kept me from tipping it. Just realizing, I noticed that my knees gave out and instead of me collapsing to the ground I was laid back on the counter, thank god that Nelly liked to keep it clean and nothing was on the counter that would break. Trying to push against him I realized more about the predicament that I was in, Dorian had one of his large smooth hands holding my wrists above my head, my head stuck in between my upper arms- unable to move, while his other arm went across my stomach and then lifted up and held my shoulder down so I couldn't turn over on my side, but in order to keep my back flat, or just because he felt like it, his chest and stomach leaned over and pressed heavily against my own. My knees were pressed tightly together to move Dorian with all my force in one strong blow, but they didn't do very much, only slid and rotated my hips while he continued to cram his tongue down my throat, my tongue vibrating as I still tried to talk but the words were muffled by his mouth.

Most of Dorian was pressed against me, holding me down and restraining me, the thought hit me slowly but once I had figured it completely out it only made me that much more concerned, I never told Dorian that he couldn't control me. His hand let go of my shoulder and slid up my neck to rest on my cheek, his breath was quick and heavy, I was trying to squirm free but I couldn't, there wasn't anything that I could do, I was throwing my body around but I wasn't able to slide off the counter or get Dorian away, my eyes were squeezed shut the entire time. I felt myself get dropped onto something, forcing me to open my eyes as the air jumped out of my lungs, but before I could catch my breath or register anything that had happened Dorian had slid up from my feet and now his entire body was weighting my own down further into the couch. His hand was no longer holding my wrist, so I brought my hands up and set them on to his collar bone, trying to push him and throw my body the other way, but I couldn't and instead I felt Dorian grab and push himself into the couch more. Dorian placed his hands on my cheeks, pinching my face to stay still while his body began to shake and pressed harder against me allowing me to feel his restrained thrusts that hit my legs, his tongue still swimming violently around my mouth, he pulled away. I needed him to stop but I was slowly loosing my edge to want him to, I was going to continue to try and get away and put up as much of a fight that I could until he went away or I won. He clamped his hand over my mouth as I threw my head to the side, staring at the back of the couch, still trying to get away but I was loosing and I couldn't get my head together to think of a way out, he kissed down my cheek again, kissing behind my jaw and below my ear. His teeth gently clamping on my pierced ear lobe and tugged a bit as his still free hand managed to slide down under me and slowly slide to touch and hold the underside of my left thigh. Stopping a small cry like noise in my throat I squeezed my eyes shut again, pushing against his chest to get him to stop and go away, even though he was probably reading my thoughts he didn't respond to what I was saying and only continued to lightly kiss and roll his tongue over my skin, causing random spurts of fire in my core. I couldn't let him do this, I pushed hard, digging my fingers to grab onto his collars and a small sound escaped his lips into my neck but it didn't sound pained, but instead like he was enjoying it and trying not to. Letting go of his collar bones I tried push harder, he kicked his feet against the arm rest, sliding himself up a few inches as my hands slid further down his chest, I felt him squint his eyes quickly and hold them shut while his body jerked against mine and pushed me deeper into the couch. Feeling another tick in my head Dorian started to kiss my skin a little harder and bite my neck a little deeper, I didn't want to get away anymore, instead just hold him close but still not continue to get any further, he slowly squeezed his hand around my leg, only his fingertips really pushing against me, as his other hand slid off my mouth. Now that his hand wasn't in the way to stop me from speaking I tried to force words out but my body wasn't allowing me to, his hand slid down my arm until it reached my hand, my arms still tingling from his touch. His hand wrestled with the bottom of my sweatshirt as he pushed his hand up and under my shirts and rested his hand on the top of my bare rib cage, his fingers tipping into my skin but his nails not cutting. Breathing seemed difficult to him as he pressed against my collar, his breathe short but deep, his body was trembling now and my own body was starting to like it, I turned my head to look at him, to get him to stop, part of myself still in control, but as soon as I opened my eyes and he saw my face he only brought his lips back to mine and didn't bother asking for entrance. My eyes instantly closed and I tried to pull my head away, though a small part of me still didn't want to, I tried to push against his fast breathing chest but a small noise only escaped into my mouth as he bit my lip gently, pulling on it, I forced my head back, trying to pull away while I was still sane. But it only allowed him to softly bite down on the front of my neck, I could feel his lips press into a smile as a small noise vibrated my throat, my hands instantly stopping with their pressure against him to allow him to push harder into me, dragging his fingers down my rib but not scratching, causing my heart rate to bump faster. Wanting him to push harder against me, I set my hands on my own chest, resting them under his chin, he pressed a little harder and his movements became a little quicker, I felt him tip his head to look up at my face, I was beat red- I could feel it, but he still continued to press his lips against me and softly bite. I forced my hands into fists, squeezing the ends of my hoodie between my fingers and palm; I let my head go back to its normal angle- I had to get out of this. I was arguing with my own body more then I was with him, of course he wasn't helping me in anyway, but I let the sickening feeling return to my body, he didn't mean what he said and it was my fault for letting him get this far, my fault for deciding to say fine, clearly he wants someone but that someone isn't me and I am just an idiot for thinking that anyone could ever feel that way about me. He continued what he was doing, although it was softer now, I could feel him staring at me again, his face holding some type of sympathy that I didn't deserve while his body acted on its own. He continued to kiss my neck but no longer bit it, my body was still wanting more while my head felt like I was getting torn apart because of what Dorian had said, what he hadn't said, and what he was doing, I could feel something building up in the corners of my eyes. But I couldn't cry, if anything happened then it was my own fault and crying would just show how pathetic I was, I was a gullible arrogant moron, I felt something brush against my cheek, forcing me to slowly open one eye. Everything about Dorian had changed, everything about him was calm, comforting, and anything but what he just was, his body was no longer pushing against mine but instead lightly laying over me as if hovering. His right arm was bent under him and resting against me, his palm lightly cupping the left side of my face, while his other hand held the top of my head gently. I felt his weight shift as he looked me in the eye, a tear had fallen down the side of my face and when I realized what he had done I didn't know how to respond but to look at him with just that look, confusion. He kissed the tear away, holding my gaze in his own, his body still trembling but I could see him trying to hold it back, again he lead down and kissed my forehead, I had no idea what to do. I wanted to ask him what he was doing, why he was doing it, and what exactly was he planning on doing, but I couldn't force any words to come out of my throat, or even form correctly in my brain, though I was still hoping that he wouldn't read my mind, I knew that he was and that meant a whole lot more then him just breaking a rule. I tried to move, pushing my fisted hands against his chest, not wanting me to look at me like that anymore, that look of care and understanding with a little bit of sympathy- I didn't want it or deserve it.

Pushing against him while pushing myself down into the couch further didn't get me anywhere, I felt Dorian's body tighten as he held his spot, I tried to crawl through the small gap that I had created, but to do that I would have to push off the couch. Looking at the window again, almost hoping that Nelly would walk in so I could break away, but Dorian just put his thumb on my chin and moved my head so I would look at him. His eyes were glossy for some reason which only added another reason that I was unable to look at them, he looked as if he was going to cry, finally his quiet voice managed to break the humming silence, "Vladimira… I'm sorry…" Desperate, a bit shaky, he sounded like he wanted to add more, but as soon as the words left his mouth I felt guilty, I am not worth enough to make someone feel bad for something they did to me- there was no way that someone could logically feel bad for doing something to me, it was me, I was an example of everything bad, pathetic, and stupid. He went to speak again, he was reading my mind, but I cut him off, "For what?" I tried to look up at him, but I couldn't, he seemed shocked by my response, I could feel a tear forming in my eye again for some stupid reason, I felt a new bruise forming on my body while the ones on my wrists were also now a little bigger. I watched his mouth instead of his face, and I squeezed my eyes shut when he leaned back down to me, driving my chin into my chest to try and get away, but I felt something press against my forehead, and then my cheek. Keeping my eyes shut for well over a few seconds I finally- slowly, peeled them open, noticing now that the room was at a different angle, I was no longer laying under Dorian but instead sitting up against the arm of the chair, looking past the shoulder in front of my face I stared at the opposite wall, my knees up to my chest but my arms in between them. Dorian slowly pulled away and for a second our eyes met, but I quickly looked down to where his arm stretched across me and wrapped around my shoulders while his other hand held him so he could lean against me. As if sensing something Dorian jumped a bit and froze, I didn't know what to say or do other then look up at him, searching his eyes to make sure everything was okay, but nothing in them said he was. Leaning forward more I kept staring at his face, turning my head around to see if he was staring at something in particular but the door was still shut and there was nothing there, slowly I placed my hand gently on his shoulder, pushing against it more then holding it, and just as slowly Dorian looked down at my hand and then back up at me.

"What is it?" I knew there was something a bit different with Dorian, he saw things, like I did when I slept, he had a vision of some sorts and his face looked as if he wasn't very happy to see it, I never am. He didn't seem to of heard my question so I asked again, "What is it, what did you see?" Shifting a little to face him as he leaned more against the back of the couch, not looking at me I watched as what looked like a tear formed in his eyes, I placed my other hand on his shoulder again as my hand fell off when he moved, but he still didn't seem all together. Staying still I waited for him to come back too, not really knowing what to say when he did but I could tell he was doing everything he could to hide what he was experiencing, although he didn't need to. His hand found its way up to my knee to grab my other hand, I held it tightly, hoping that he would be able to feel it and know that he was okay but his expression didn't change, and he went to pull away from my hand but I held tight. Instead I was pulled across his lap, quickly pulling myself together, moved my still folded knees to the floor and set myself atop of them, still holding his hand though I was now sitting at his feet in front of him, I looked up trying to meet his eyes, still holding his hand. Finally I saw him give another small jump and I knew that he was back, although confused for a moment, he was fine, I wanted to ask again, but I kept in mind that if he really wanted me to know then he would tell me, his eyes locked on mine till he noticed that my hands were holding his almost shaking hand. Quickly looking back to me he looked like he was going to cry again, I knew he might want to cry but he was Dorian- he didn't cry, I couldn't let him give in to tears that he probably deserved to shed because I didn't want him to regret it, he was the tough scary guy, "What's wrong?" I tried to nonchalantly push away his need to cry and cover it with something else and let him sort it out later but that didn't look like it was going to work. My breath hitched slightly as I found myself pulled onto his lap and into his arms, my hands no longer holding his hand but folded against my chest, he was hugging me and I was so shocked I didn't know what to do. It sounded as if he was going to cry again, his breath was shaky and uneven, without thinking I pushed my arms around him, folding my arms tightly around his quivering shoulders, and I felt him squeeze around my waist more. Feeling his break silently I knew he was crying and my natural instinct kicked in, speaking softly I tried to comfort him, "Shhhhhh…. What's wrong?" I squeezed him a little tighter and brought my left hand up to brush his hair back, although most of his face was buried in my shoulder causing most of his head to be pushed against my face, I weaved my fingers through the back of his short hair, brushing it.

He let out a small laugh, and instead of feeling like an idiot I knew that the laugh was forced and that he didn't find anything funny, but I still waited for him to collect himself before I asked another question. Nuzzling his face into my neck and shoulder he squeezed me tighter, his warm breath uneven as it hit my chest and neck, "You…" he started and I could tell that he was still trying to choke back tears, "You….should never be this forgiving…" As if catching himself he stopped talking and froze a little again, like a new wave was coming over him, quickly I pressed a little harder, trying to 'summon' him out of whatever he was thinking and I felt him trying to regain himself, "H-People…" I listened intently, he was going to say he- at least I think he was but he continued, "People… you get hurt- and yet… As soon as someone says their sorry… you open yourself to them…" I didn't know if he was mad at me or in a long run calling me a whore, but I kept listening, I didn't know exactly as to what he was talking about because I couldn't think of a specific moment, "Please… don't do that…" I pulled away a little to look at his face, but I only managed to be able to see a little over half of it, he didn't look me in the eye but continued to look over my shoulder. "What do you mean?" my voice was smooth compared to his normally singing like voice, "You get hurt… don't do that…" I could see his face change a little as he looked like he was about to cry again but instead of continuing to stare at him I forced myself to hug him again, allowing him to catch a breath.

After minutes I heard my alarm in my room go off again, signaling that it was now 7:20, the time when I have to leave my house and start walking to school, although I normally rode with Henry I was too lazy to take the time off. I didn't move as soon as I heard it click onto the radio because Dorian was still seemingly uneasy and having problems trying to sort through everything in his brain, though I wasn't exactly sure as to what would effect the centuries old vampire, making the thought of it in my head just that much worse. Only a little under a minute after the sound went off I felt Dorian pull away, allowing me to slowly pull away making sure that he was okay and not just faking it or something but I could tell by his reaction that he was no longer reading my mind. Searching his eyes I tried to check before I stood up, but when his eyes met mine I could tell that he wasn't and that me staring into his eyes wasn't helping him. Slowly standing up I noticed that the pill I took earlier had worn off and now the pain in my hips were back, but I ignored the pain and walked around the couch leaving a still semi-upset Dorian on the couch to stare at a window. Reaching my room I turned off the alarm, realizing it was now 7:33, I would have to run to school in order to make it there by 7:45, I guess I would be late then, no way I would be able to walk comfortably, let alone run. When I reached my alarm I sunk to the floor at the side of my bed, leaning against and on the bed while my legs folded underneath me on the floor, my arm still outstretched to turn off the clock though I had now been off for well over two minutes. Suddenly I was downstairs and I was no longer standing, I was looking off to my left to see around the bottom of the stairs, looking at the living room and bits of the dining room visible, I looked up to my left to see Dorian's face, looking down at me with a bow smile, I noticed that he had me cradled in his arms against his chest, his left arm under my knees while his right arm wrapped around my shoulders, causing me to blush and him to give a small laugh. I went to move to get down but he held tight, I noticed that he was smiling more as a small laugh echoed in his chest while he watched my red face turn redder the longer he held me there, I was extremely nervous and I didn't know what to do which just made all my movements that much more disgraceful and him laugh all the more. Finally I managed to scoot out of his grasp, almost falling as my feet clumsily hit the ground, falling towards the wall to keep me off the ground, my face still glowing red, but quickly my back was on the wall with my hands loosely bent up to rest near my shoulders while Dorian stood in front of me with his hands pressed to the sides of me, boxing me against the wall, my face remaining the bright red. My heart pounding against my chest making me just blush even more, his smile faded from the bow it was but still present, feeling his breath hit the cold sweat on the nape of my neck as he leaned closer to me. His lips brushing against my ear as he leaned even closer, only his face though, the rest of him not in contact with my body, his breath whistling around my ear as he gave a small laugh at my still bright red face. Heat emanating from my shoulders up to reach him, a shiver running down my spine as I felt him softly nip at my earlobe, causing me to have an uncertain feeling, it didn't hurt though normally that should but it was almost so brief that I desired it again, except more. Giving off another small laugh he pressed against me tightly for a second, his whole body basically wrapping around me and enveloping me, the lightening feeling shooting up through me again, but just as quickly I was sitting in the kitchen, sitting at the long oak table in a chair that had been pushed in and then suddenly there was a blood bag in front of me, the tip cut off for someone to drink out of it, I looked up at the hand holding it. Dorian looked at me with such a mixed expression I could tell what exactly it was that he thinking or feeling, so many things wrong with the current situation. First it was my house and he was giving me food? That wasn't right. Second it was almost 8 in the morning, too early to eat, I rarely eat in the morning, only when I don't eat the night before and I'm afraid I'll slip up in school. Third, it's so extremely awkward to eat in front of someone, I rarely do and when I do, it's barely any. But before I could speak any of these, my mouth freezing halfway open once I saw the blood bag I looked up at him but before my eyes could focus he had already bent down pressed his lips against my open mouth, slipped the blood bag into my hand, and left the room. I stared at the bag for a few seconds, but decided why not? I stood up, walking over to the sink as I chugged it, school was going to be starting very soon and while it's not like I couldn't just run and be there in less then a minute the fact that it would hurt was the problem I was facing. Drinking almost three fourths of the bag I dumped the rest down the sink, turning on the water to allow it to be washed down and then placing the bag in the orange hazardous container under the sink. Turning off the water and turning around I was stunned to see that Dorian was standing in the doorway again, a strange look yet again on his face, I went to say something but my body froze again as I looked down and noticed what he had in his hand.

"Thanks." I walked towards him, he had gone upstairs and grabbed my backpack, not that it was very heavy, it only had a notebook and a book in it, but the fact that it was upstairs was the problem. When I reached him I went to grab the backpack but as I reached for it he pulled it away, his face had a smile as if he thought my face was priceless, I didn't know what to say to him, so I just scowled at him, I didn't have times to play games, I had to go to school very soon and I was running out of times, as much as I wanted to, packing as much sarcasm into the thought as I could, I didn't have enough time. Giving him a more questioning glance he finally did something that said what he was doing, he turned around and pointed at his back, I could tell the way he was holding his other arm that he actually expected me to jump on his back. I gave a small laugh, "Do you really expect me to do that?" I moved my head to the side a little to get a better view of his grinning face; he had a childish grin that told me he was teasing me. "Well you have two choices…" he began, not turning around anymore to look at me, but instead looking over his shoulder still, I crossed my arms, shifting my weight- force of habit, but he clearly wanted that type of reaction, "Really now? And what are my choices?" I heard the small deep laugh echo from him again, he was having fun, and it was making me blush again for a few reasons. "… You can either jump on my back-" "No- no way." I cut him off, but it only made him laugh more and he moved so fast I barely even saw it till he got to where he was going. Standing behind me he wrapped his arm around me, placing the palm of his left hand on my right cheek so gently that it tingled at first, causing me to blush yet again. "Or…" he continued with a laugh in his voice that said that he enjoyed me just cutting him off more then he found it rude, "I'll carry you like I just did all the way to school…" I blushed again, turning my head to look up at him with a look that begged him to be joking but he only laughed more and leaned down close to me, my whole body now leaned into his embrace, in my ear he whispered and I instantly glowed red again, "If I can resist long enough…"

My first reaction was to jump out of his arms, but it was mixed, part of me wanted to run away because I was nervous and the other half wanted to stay with his arms wrapped around me. Freezing instead I stared straight ahead, he leaned down and placed a small kiss on my neck, holding his face there to breath on my neck, sending a shiver down my spine. Time seemed to be at a standstill but I slowly snapped myself out of it, "I have to go to school…" He slowly breathed out again, almost like a sigh, knowing that I had to but also knowing that I didn't want to, that he didn't want me to leave. Slowly reaching I found my backpack and nonchalantly took it out of his hand, him being so lost that I don't think he even noticed till I started to walk out of his grasp. I didn't want to though, his arms were warm and he understood and accepted me- why wouldn't I want to stay surrounded by that, but I had to get to school, I gave a small laugh as I heard him give a small growl in protest. Walking hurt my hips though, but I swallowed the slowly decreasing pain and tried to just get through the day without anyone noticing, especially Otis.

The breath in my throat hitched as I was suddenly lifted off my feet, my whole body on edge at the sudden movement, I looked up to find what had caused it only to see a smiling Dorian looking down at me. Quickly catching my breath I felt my face heat up, burying my chin into my chest as to hide my face he gave another small laugh, but it was cut short and when I looked up he seemed genuinely concerned… or maybe angry. Following his gaze my heart stopped for a beat, standing in the living room was D'Ablo.

Trying to climb down out of Dorian's grasp I was denied when he only held me tighter, I broke my eye contact to look up at Dorian, "Isn't this…" D'Ablo paused for a minute, a smirk playing on his lips, "Sad." Dorian tightened his hold on me, I didn't know why he was so concerned, I could handle myself, and then I felt his telepathic message, _Stay still, don't speak… I'm sorry for speaking telepathically, but I will not read your mind-, _I cut him off in my own mind, _It's fine…_ he gave a small squeeze as if accepting my reply, him and D'Ablo were having a stare down that I only now noticed. "It isn't very polite to have private conversations, keeping me locked out, I know we haven't gotten along well, but there is no reason for rudeness." D'Ablo seemed to be enjoying himself, though Dorian definitely had an upper hand even with me in his arms.

"What do you want?" My tone wasn't exactly mean, but it was not welcoming either, I heard Dorian's breath hitch, remembering now that he told me not to speak, _Sorry_, I was not going to stay quiet either way, did he forget it was me? "Oh, well… I came to see how my darling Vladimira was healing after our last encounter, hoping the dreams have subsided?" D'Ablo knew that Dorian wasn't told of this, and the whole thing was locked away with several marks, by D'Ablo himself, so that Otis- or any other vampire would find out. _What?_ Dorian didn't seemed very pleased with what D'Ablo had said, _I'll tell you later…_ he was silent, but still giving off the feeling that he wanted to hear now, _Promise._ He seemed satisfied with that answer and turned all his attention back to D'Ablo, "After your little run in with Ignatius, I wanted to make sure you healed all right." He smiled again, enjoying the game he was playing, though he was the only one playing, I shrugged in response, "The little batty had nothing on me." I gave a smartass answer, my natural reaction to anything to serious, denying the truth completely because Ignatius had almost literally ripped me apart, throwing knives at me like a dart board and punching me like I was a punching bag. D'Ablo seemed thrilled for once that I was being a smartass, so much so that he joined in, "On the contrary, as you would say it, he had a whole lot on you." I almost wanted to laugh at his attempt but when I looked up to Dorian I became confused, he looked very angry and he looked as if he was trying not to collapse, I forced myself out of his arms to stand next to him, looking up at him though he was bent over a little.

"Ah, so it works." D'Ablo clapped his hands and took a step closer, I turned around to look at him, "What works?" Dorian fell, collapsing to his knees, shaking violently; I put my arms on his sides to keep him from tipping too much one way, keeping my eye contact with D'Ablo. "Well… I had this small… charm; if you will… made for me, just for Dorian, I figured I could level the playing field." He shrugged his shoulders and walked closer. "What did you do?" I looked down at Dorian, trying to sound as calm as possible, "I didn't do anything, but… since he can no longer move, I suggest you back away from him, or he's going to get hurt." D'Ablo was smiling his sickly smile, the one he used when he thought he was on top of everything, Dorian clasped his hand on my arm as if to tell me not to listen to what he was saying, but I did anyway. I could protect myself but not both of us, I pushed him back gently, softly leaning him against the wall, I stood up to look at D'Ablo, "Why? Like a punk like you could managed to hurt him." I spoke to him, though I had already done what he had recommended, I didn't want him to think he had the upper hand, because although he didn't want to admit it, we were pretty evenly matched.

"But see," D'Ablo started, stepping closer still, "I can hurt him," he paused for dramatic effect which really wasn't necessary because I was already listening to his every word, "by hurting you." Before I could even comprehend what he had said I was trying to regain my focus as my back slammed and bounced off the wall, landing me on my ass, "Shit." I mumbled; he was using his vampire strength, the cheater. The crack slowly registered a few seconds after I had hit the ground, the pain even slower, my arm wrapped around my side as I felt at least two now broken ribs. I managed to stand up and look as though nothing had just happened, D'Ablo stood a few feet away, but still too close for comfort, in front of me; shrugging his shoulders like it was nothing. "Come now Vladimira… After everything, you should have learned by now how to protect yourself." He was getting ready to attack again; I could see it in his eyes. My heart was racing but I couldn't seem to think straight, it was like I was looking through a dirty window and instead of see the mountains behind it all I saw was the dirt on the window. I took a defensive stance and readied myself for his attack, but everything seemed slowed down, by the time I noticed that he had moved he was already inches from me, I threw myself to my side, trying not to hurt my throbbing ribs any more than they already were. Landing on my feet I pounced towards the door, trying to maneuver to get behind D'Ablo but he caught hold of my knee, driving his gloved thumb into the back of my knee, I could feel the blood pouring down but just as quickly he had me thrown into the wall again. I didn't understand. My ribs were cracked, my knee was gushing blood, everything was throbbing, my mind was hazy, but it was D'Ablo, I could win against him, at least damage him a little in the long run but it had only been a few minutes, how could he already have damaged me this much? He reached for my throat, but instead I bit his hand, almost ripping off a chunk completely, he quickly withdrew his hand with a hiss, and just as quickly slapped me across the face, sending my face to meet the floor. Again D'Ablo tried to grab me but this time I didn't even see his hand, chocking me while pinning me to the wall he gave a small laugh. "I wasn't expecting you to be able to put up this much of a fight, but I can quickly fix that," I felt him squeeze tighter around my throat, I brought my hands up to rip at his arm but he wouldn't let go, my lungs began to ache, I realized that I should have been kicking him too but for some reason I couldn't multitask, though my mind was already hazy now I knew I was dying when the edges of my vision became blurred, everything around me seemed so loud and hectic though I couldn't understand any of it. The dirty window I was looking out became smaller and smaller and in the tiny frames nothing I saw I could comprehend, my lungs feeling like they were shriveling up and about to fall off just made my head reel more and I could feel my body become distant. Finally, everything just stopped.

I wasn't aware of when, but at some point my air returned to my lungs and the aching and hollowing feeling I was experiencing disappeared. I was comfortable, till I felt a sharp pain in my side and noticed that my leg felt extremely cold around and below the knee. My eyes felt extremely heavy and they didn't want to open, but I forced them open anyway, though my eyelids fought and continued to blink slowly and only open halfway. Everything was sideways, only when I saw Otis standing in front of me did I notice that I was laying on the living room floor still, Otis was bent down in front of me, and then I was being lifted up, but it was by Otis. He started to yell at whoever was picking me up but his voice was muffled to my ears, I wanted to turn my head to look, I didn't know who it could be, but when they lifted me they managed to somewhat ease the pressure on my ribs. Otis was getting closer and closer till my face was comfortably pressed into his side and arm, I wanted to get up, I've been through a lot worse than this but yet I still needed to be carried, no way. Trying to wiggle out of whoevers, I think Otis', arms, I couldn't move very much but I guess enough to make an impression,

_Vladimira, you're injured… sleep now._

_Before I could argue with the voice I found my eyes no longer wanted to stay open, no longer wanted me awake, forcing me to drift back into a black world but in a much more peaceful and comfortable way. _


End file.
